《满江红·小住京华》(秋瑾)
苦将侬,强派作蛾眉,殊未屑!
莽红尘何处觅知音?青衫湿!
I've dwelt in Royal Town for a short time
Ere the Moon Festival in autumn clime.
Beside the fence are widespread yellow flowers
As if the autumn face were wiped by showers.
Our homeland is besieged on every side.
I've for eight years been homesick for its tide.
Thou hast pushed me to be a lady fair,
But that is never what I care!Though I possess no body of a boy,
A stronger mind than him I do enjoy.
Well, at all times I bare my heart and soul,
To seek delight for others being my goal.
Among the mortals, who can read my mind?
When cornered, a great mind will torment find.
Where in the world can I find perfect peers?
Oh, my black gown was wet with tears!
翻译技巧解析
原作出自近代秋瑾的词作《满江红·小住京华》。
译文采用“直译法”,将“莽红尘何处觅知音”译为“Where in the world can I find perfect peers?”,将“俗子胸襟谁识我”译为“Among the mortals, who can read my mind?”,再现了原作的概念意义和语序特点;采用“意译法”,将“四面歌残终破楚”译为“Our homeland is besieged on every side”,以帮助英语读者准确理解原作的内涵意义;使用“合句译法”,将“小住京华,早又是,中秋佳节”译为“I've dwelt in Royal Town for a short time/ Ere the Moon Festival in autumn clime”,将“算平生肝胆,因人常热”译为“Well, at all times I bare my heart and soul,/ To seek delight for others being my goal”,体现了“汉语重意合、英语重形合”的文化差异;使用“转态译法”,将“秋容如拭”译为“As if the autumn face were wiped by showers”,体现了“汉语惯用主动语态、英语惯用被动语态”的文化差异;使用“换序译法”,将“英雄末路当磨折”译为“When cornered, a great mind will torment find”,保证了上下诗行韵律的和谐;使用“具体译法”,将“青衫湿”译为“Oh, my black gown was wet with tears”,表达了原作的语境意义。 同时,译文创造了翻译美学的“三维美”。首先,两个诗节统一运用“两行转韵”的表现手法(第一诗节的韵脚为time、clime、flowers、showers、side、tide、fair、care;第二诗节的韵脚为boy、enjoy、soul、goal、mind、find、peers、tears),两个诗节的第一至第七诗行统一运用“抑扬格五音步”、第八诗行统一运用“抑扬格四音步”的英诗格律。在第一诗节第三至第四诗行中,词汇fence和face押头韵和辅韵,词汇widespread和wiped押头韵和元韵,词汇flowers和showers押尾韵,且第一组词汇中的头韵和辅韵双重音素[ f ] 和[ s ] 、第二组词汇中的头韵和元韵双重音素[ w ] 和[ aɪ ] 、第三组词汇中的尾韵音素[aʊəz] 按照“a-b-c-a-b-c”的规律交叉排列(fence、widespread、flowers、face、wiped、showers),构成“交叉韵”修辞格,赞美了京华秋色的明净;在第一诗节第五至第六诗行中,词汇besieged和been押元韵,词汇side和tide押尾韵,且第一组词汇中的元韵音素[ iː ]、第二组词汇中的尾韵音素[ aɪd ] 按照“a-b-a-b”的规律交叉排列(besieged、side、been、tide),构成“交叉韵”修辞格,强调了列强逼近的局面;在第二诗节第三至第四诗行中,词汇times和delight押元韵,词汇bare 和being押头韵,词汇soul和goal押尾韵,且第一组词汇中的元韵音素[ aɪ ] 、第二组词汇中的头韵音素[ b ] 、第三组词汇中的尾韵音素[ əʊl ] 按照“a-b-c-a-b-c”的规律交叉排列(time、bare、soul、delight、being、goal),构成“交叉韵”修辞格,抒发了肝胆相照的诚心;在第二诗节第五至第六诗行中,词汇mortals和cornered押元韵,词汇mind和find押尾韵,且第一组词汇中的元韵音素[ ɔː ] 、第二组词汇中的尾韵音素[ aɪnd ] 按照“a-b-a-b”的规律交叉排列(mortals、mind、cornered、find),构成“交叉韵”修辞格,表达了遭受磨难的感慨;在第二诗节第七至第八诗行中,词汇world和wet 押头韵,词汇peers和tears押尾韵,且第一组词汇中的头韵音素[ w ] 、第二组词汇中的尾韵音素[ ɪəz ] 按照“a-b-a-b”的规律交叉排列(world、peers、wet、tears),构成“交叉韵”修辞格,抒发了知音难觅的感慨。此外,词汇beside和widespread、词汇gown 和drowned押元韵,词汇that和what、词汇read和mind、词汇mind和find押内韵,词汇body和boy、词汇perfect和peers押头韵。两行转韵、抑扬格五音步、抑扬格四音步、交叉韵、元韵、内韵、头韵等美学表现手法使韵律悦耳动听,节奏自然优美,抒发了作者摆脱封建礼教束缚、立志救国救民的思想感情,创造了诗词的音韵美。 其次,译文结构紧凑,层次分明,语言洗练,风格高雅,且句式多样,如简单句“I've dwelt in Royal Town for a short time/ Ere the Moon Festival in autumn clime”、并列句“Thou hast pushed me to be a lady fair,/ But that is never what I care”以及复合句“Though I possess no body of a boy,/ A stronger mind than him I do enjoy”,又如陈述句“Well, at all times I bare my heart and soul,/ To seek delight for others being my goal”、疑问句“Where in the world can I find perfect peers”以及倒装句“Beside the fence are widespread yellow flowers/ As if the autumn face were wiped by showers”,体现了翻译的灵活性和多样性,表达了作者的远大抱负,创造了诗词的形式美;第一诗节使用词汇homeland和homesick,构成“同词根重复”修辞格,前后呼应,相得益彰,突出了作者的家国情怀,创造了诗词的形式美;使用古英语词汇ere、thou和hast,构成“拟古”修辞格,营造了诗歌的古雅风格,创造了诗词的形式美;使用掉尾句“Though I possess no body of a boy,/ A stronger mind than him I do enjoy”,突出了巾帼英雄立志救国的远大抱负,创造了诗词的形式美;最后诗行“Oh, my black gown was wet with tears”部分地引用白居易长篇叙事诗《琵琶行/琵琶引》》中中的诗句英译“Who of all present weeps his tears the most?/ He whose black gown was wet with tears, the host”(“座中泣下谁最多?江州司马青衫湿”),构成“引用”修辞格,创造了诗词的形式美。 再次,将“中秋佳节”译为the Moon Festival in autumn clime,景如画面,情似清风,渲染了月色朦胧的意境,烘托了思念故乡的愁绪,创造了诗词的意象美、意涵美、意境美;短语homesick for its tide描绘了故乡的汹涌海潮,暗示了浙江的沿海位置,创造了诗词的意象美;词汇that暗示了作者不屑一顾的态度,创造了诗词的意蕴美;短语bare my heart and soul描绘了同心相亲、肝胆相照的赤城之情,创造了诗词的意象美、意涵美;短语wet with tears表现了泪湿沾巾的情景,渲染了知音难觅的无限愁情。“三维美”艺术地表现了一代巾帼英雄在民族危亡之际舍家别子、立志救国的远大抱负,谱写了一首爱国主义的英雄赞歌。
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