教材问题，兹事体大。本号曾批高考语文试卷作文题干语病成灾，批北外网、北
【原文】Our English teacher Ms Chen wrote the sentence on the blackboard and said, “Please write this down.”
We started to write. I wrote down the first word and stopped.
“That’s not right. But is it OK to point out the mistake? Is that polite, in the first lesson?” Questions jumped into my mind.
“Why aren’t you writing, Wang Han?”
I looked up at Ms Chen. My eyes met hers. My mouth felt dry.
But then I thought about the meaning of the sentence. I put up my hand.
“Ms Chen, there’s a mistake,” I said. “That sentence is from Confucius, not from Mencius.”
"Well done, Wang Han. In fact, this is my first lesson for all of you. You are now in junior high school. Learning will be more difficult. It’s important to think more in your learning. Please always remember this.”
That’s really an important lesson!
【插花】初一英语课文，不要写成福尔摩斯探案集，
2.用错冠词：用不定冠词a在初次登场的sentence前，
3.用错代词：write this down这this指啥？不够明确，改用代词it指上面提到的句子。
4.指令不清：宜加in your notebook明晰指令。这是对全部的单个个体同学说的，
5.用We欠妥：非主角的群演全班同学的本尊名词都还没出现，就蹦出个代替他们的代词We，虽然从下文可以推测出We指代的是谁，还是显得冒失！改We为集体名词The (whole) class。
6.行为细分：强调行为write something down写下记下抄录，目的是以免遗忘等；
7.句意不全：当堂纠错的行为关键是当堂，否则句子失去支撑，加
8.再错冠词：因后句“第一节课就指出老师的错误...？”
9.指代混乱：“That’s not right. ...Is that polite,...?”
10.意思反复：第二问句的in the first lesson包含in class概念，应在上一句说，在此句宜调整为on the first day。
11.顾虑错向：关于礼貌vs不礼貌，顾虑的方向是担心行为会
12.孤悬名词：Questions把语篇的逻辑脉络打断了！
14.宜先叫名：教师在课堂上询问具体学生时，应先叫出学生姓名，一开声就明确指令的对象，再提出问题或指令，这样可以避免其他学生误以为是在说自己而引起不必要的紧张。否则，那些主动在老师板书同时就做笔记的学生可能会误以为在说他/她，而在心理反应上产生惊跳，后提名字的说法，无疑会加重课堂的紧张气氛并造成心理压力。所以， “...
15.注意语气：教师使用课堂用语，要有语言艺术，应尽量使用温
责备：“Why aren’t you writing, Wang Han?” 你为什么没在写，汪涵？
建议："Wang Han, why don't you write?" 汪涵，你咋不写呢？
16.用法生僻：mouth felt dry或felt (a) dry mouth。明明有规范英语表达I felt a little bit nervous.或I felt a little/bit nervous.可以学的，教材却舍本逐末，去追逐生僻表达，这种过于戏剧化的句子很难引导学生与文本产生共鸣。上一句目光接触都最好删除，说如：I looked up at Ms. Chen, feeling a bit nervous. But then I...
【插花】可怜全国使用该教材的孩子，
17.该注未注：口语But then意为：然而/然后/但另说/可后来。But then, I...但转念一想，我...。thought about：“考虑到”虽然也有“想起/想到”之意，但不如还加上作出准确判断的understood。改为But then I (thought about the sentence and suddenly) understood/grasped /realized its true meaning.但随后转念一想，我明白了这句话的真谛。铺垫学生举手纠错的前发过程，增强自然流畅感。该教材在附录Word
18. 宜加一句：I got it! 我明白了！
19. 加连接词：So, I put up my hand.
20. 太过直白：直接说there's a mistake太唐突，宜调整语气，宜加I believe我相信[自信]/I think我认为[谨慎]/I'm afraid恐怕[谦逊]。最好删除there's a mistake，把I think直接加到纠正的事实句前。
21.This/That不分：英语课堂教学，
22.明确是非：得加一句You're right.
23.用my不当：This is my first lesson for...，叙事角度错误。 此时不是教师向他人讲述自己的课如何，而是以学生为叙事主角，所以my宜改为定冠词the以强调客观部分，如要表达lesson的来源可用定语从句代替for，说如This is the first lesson I want to give you all.
24.徒增压力：You are now in junior high school陈述一个对方无可辩驳的事实，常用于表达训诫批评指责。不传递新信息却只是强调对方身份的话语，给学生造成压力，不利于孩子们的身心健康。Learning will be more difficult. 这句更是加重学生的心理负担！应改成更为积极的语句，在点出学情的同时加上支持语句，如：Learning in junior high school may be more challenging/difficult. Let's work hard together.咱们师生一起共同努力！表达老师与学生共同面对挑战的态度，这符合师生平等互助的现代教育理念 。You are all English professors at the university!
25. your冗余：It’s important to think more in your learning.或：It’s important to think more when learning.
26. 语气太重：Please always remember this.请永远铭记在心？删除always。
【插花】类似这种不当加重的话语泛滥，啥都重要啥都强调，
27. 指代不清：this指啥？不够明晰。
28.句序错位：Please remember this: it is important...应提前放在紧跟lesson for all of you句之后。
29.时态错误：That's...应改为That was really an important lesson.“那个是”指的是当时，距离现在就是过去。
【插花】教学内容常先入为主。先给错误信息，
英语教材错误密度如此之高！教材专家委员会是咋审查的？
如何提高教材质量？请比较原文及拙作修改版。
【智华英语修改版】The First Lesson
In our first English class, our teacher, Ms. Chen, wrote a sentence on the blackboard: "Learning without thinking is of no use." She said, “This sentence comes from Mencius. Please write it down in your notebook.”
The whole class started writing. I wrote the first word and stopped.
“That’s not right. Should I point out a mistake in class?Is it not polite to do so on the first day?” These questions came
“Wang Han, do you have any thoughts to share?"
I looked up at Ms. Chen and felt a bit nervous. But then I thought about the sentence and suddenly understood its true meaning. I got it! So, I put up my hand.
“Ms. Chen,” I said. “I think this sentence is from Confucius, not Mencius.”
“Well done, Wang Han. You're right. In fact, this is the first lesson for all of you. Please remember: It’s important to think more in learning. Learning in junior high school may be more challenging. Let's work hard together. ”
That was really an important lesson!
【修改小结】修改后文本语言规范、语用贴合、逻辑通顺、语气亲和、篇章紧凑，可激发学生学习兴趣，彰显鼓励求真、师生合作精神，更有心理健康关爱，传达核心育人理念。
不才学浅，错误难免，请不吝赐教！
