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续昨天的文章《齐天“大剩”结婚记（六）八十八个让你分手的问题》，分享纽约时报上的三十六个让彼此相爱的问题。感谢ChatGPT的翻译。问题的英文原文以及原始报告的链接见文末。
第一组问题：
1.如果可以选择世界上的任何一个人，你想邀请谁共进晚餐？
2.你想成名吗？想以什么方式成名？
3.在打电话之前，你会排练一下你要说的话吗？为什么？
4.对你来说，什么样的一天算是“完美”的？
5.你上一次自己唱歌是什么时候？给别人唱呢？
6.如果你能活到90岁，并且在生命的最后60年中保持30岁的心智或身体，你会选择哪一个？
7.你有没有预感自己会如何去世？
8.说出你和你的伴侣似乎有的三个共同点。
9.在你的人生中，你最感激什么？
10.如果你可以改变自己成长的方式，你会改变什么？
11.用四分钟的时间，尽可能详细地告诉你的伴侣你的生平故事。
12.如果你明天醒来能获得任何一种品质或能力，你希望是什么？
第二组问题：
13.如果一颗水晶球可以告诉你关于自己、你的生活、未来或其他任何事情的真相，你想知道什么？
14.有没有一件你梦寐以求很久的事情？为什么你还没有去做？
15.你一生中最大的成就是什么？
16.在友谊中你最看重什么？
17.你最珍贵的记忆是什么？
18.你最可怕的记忆是什么？
19.如果你知道自己将在一年内突然去世，你会改变现在的生活方式吗？为什么？
20.友谊对你来说意味着什么？
21.爱与感情在你的生活中扮演什么角色？
22.轮流分享你认为伴侣的一个积极特质。总共分享五个。
23.你的家庭有多亲近和温暖？你觉得你的童年比大多数人更幸福吗？
24.你对自己与母亲的关系有何感受？
第三组问题：
25.每人说出三个真实的“我们”陈述。例如：“我们都在这个房间里感到……”
26.完成这个句子：“我希望有一个人可以和我分享……”
27.如果你要和你的伴侣成为亲密朋友，请分享对他或她来说重要的信息。
28.告诉你的伴侣你喜欢他们的地方；这次要非常诚实，说出那些你可能不会对刚认识的人说的话。
29.和你的伴侣分享你人生中一个尴尬的时刻。
30.你上次在别人面前哭是什么时候？自己一个人哭呢？
31.告诉你的伴侣你已经喜欢他们的一个地方。
32.什么事情是太严肃而不能开玩笑的？
33.如果你今晚去世，无法再与任何人沟通，你最遗憾没有告诉某人的事情是什么？为什么还没有告诉他们？
34.你的房子着火了，里面有你所有的财物。在救出你所爱的人和宠物之后，你还有时间安全地冲进去救出一件物品。那会是什么？为什么？
35.在你家里所有的人中，谁的死亡会让你最难过？为什么？
36.分享一个个人问题，并请你的伴侣给出他或她可能会如何处理的建议。也请你的伴侣反思你对所选问题的感受。
Set I
1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?
2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?
3. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?
4. What would constitute a “perfect” day for you?
5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?
7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.
9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.
12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?
Set II
13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?
14. Is there something that you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?
15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
16. What do you value most in a friendship?
17. What is your most treasured memory?
18. What is your most terrible memory?
19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?
20. What does friendship mean to you?
21. What roles do love and affection play in your life?
22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.
23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s?
24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?
Set III
25. Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “We are both in this room feeling ... “
26. Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share ... “
27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.
28. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met.
29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.
30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?
31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.
32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet?
34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?
35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?
36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.
The Experimental Generation of Interpersonal Closeness: A Procedure and Some Preliminary Findings - Arthur Aron, Edward Melinat, Elaine N. Aron, Robert Darrin Vallone, Renee J. Bator, 1997 (sagepub.com)
作者简介：
作者旺财小姐姐，中国制造，美国加工，现身居硅谷。熬过CBD的夜，撕过大厂的逼，走过国际组织的场，现在来旷野转转。
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