如何正确培养习惯(最重要的一课)How To Properly Build Your Habit （中英佳文）

如何正确地建立你的习惯

在前面的课程中，我们介绍了本课程的一个策略，即用好的基本习惯取代你的坏习惯。

然后我们讨论了习惯是如何运作的，揭穿了几个误解，这是你可以采用的三个最强大的习惯。

所以，到目前为止，你应该记住一个习惯，你将在本课程的剩余时间里继续努力。

在今天的课程中，我们将讨论如何正确地开始养成你的习惯。

我们将介绍如何战略性地选择线索，如何构建你的日常生活，让你事半功倍地接近自动性，最后是如何有效地奖励自己，让你的习惯坚持下去。

毫无疑问，这是本课程中最重要的部分之一，所以一定要密切关注。

好吧，让我们开始吧。

提示是触发你的大脑完成日常工作并获得奖励的原因。

因此，选择每天出现的提示是很重要的。

因为如果你选择了一个线索，比如醒来时阳光照在你的脸上，当然，你大部分时间都会坚持你的习惯。

但是，如果外面下雨，你就不会被要求坚持你的日常生活。

同时，你想要选择一个不可避免的线索。

你的提示需要是你每天都会遇到的东西，无论你在哪里，你在做什么，甚至你的感觉如何。

例如，我读书习惯的线索是吃。

每当我吃饭的时候，我都会拿起一本书或在网上读一些内容丰富的文章。

这个提示是我每天都会做的事情，而且是不可避免的。

我可能生病了；我可能在另一个国家。没关系，因为我还得吃饭。

你可以考虑为自己的习惯提供其他不可避免的线索，比如洗澡、刷牙、登录电脑，甚至下班通勤。

有很多可能性，你选择什么并不重要，只要你的提示每天都会出现。

你要记住的另一件事是，你的提示应该使你有可能立即完成你的日常工作。

比方说，你选择的主要习惯是冥想。

把这种例行公事与上班等暗示联系起来可能并不明智。

如果你计划每天工作的前十分钟都在冥想，你的老板可能会打断你，给你一个任务，你会分心，完全忘记冥想，这可能会带来一些困难。

你想做的是选择一个线索，让你更容易完成你的日常生活。

例如，如果你试图养成的主要习惯是健身，那么在下班通勤途中想到健身房是非常有效的。

这样，当你下班回来时，你会自然而然地看到你的提示，那就是去健身房。

这个提示很好，因为当你看到它时，你离开始你的日常生活只有几秒钟的时间了。

在选择球杆时，我想注意的最后一件事是，你想选择一根球杆。

你想让你的大脑将一个独特的线索与一个唯一的程序联系起来。

一半的时间你在使用提示A，另一半的时间使用提示你基本上同时养成了两个习惯。

正因为如此，你可能需要两倍的时间才能达到自动线，这也是你甚至不再需要考虑养成习惯的时间点。

好吧，接下来我们要讨论的是常规。

现在，大多数人看待日常生活的方式存在巨大问题。

你看，大多数养成新习惯的人对日常生活的期望都非常高。

他们告诉自己，他们将每周锻炼五次，至少一个半小时，每天冥想至少二十分钟，每周至少读完一本书。

如果你希望每天都能表现得很好，你最终会在某个地方遇到一些问题。可能需要一周时间；可能要一个月。

总有一天你的意志力会很低。

可能是因为你生病了。可能是因为你前一天晚上喝多了。甚至可能是因为你工作太多了。

不管是什么，这些糟糕的日子是不可避免的。

现在，我们将在本课程的后面更深入地研究意志力的概念，但现在，我只想让你记住这两个

关于意志力的事实。

第一个事实是，如果你的习惯还是新的，那么它需要相当大的意志力才能坚持下去。

你的习惯越接近自动性，就越不需要意志力。

第二个事实是，我们的大脑会尽力保存意志力。

因此，当你的意志力水平下降到某个阈值以下时，它会尽其所能来保护它。

好吧，所以你的意志力水平很低，当你下班回来时，你会看到你的健身房，这是你的提示，这意味着你必须锻炼一个半小时。

你的大脑要做什么？

你的大脑会说，我们不可能用这几乎是空的意志力来锻炼一个半小时。

我可以向你保证，他会说服你不要去的。

所以，你最终会回家边吃多力多滋边狂看新一季的《怪奇物语》。

第二天早上醒来时，你会感到可怕和内疚，因为从技术上讲，你违背了新年的决心。

你去健身房的动机已经不一样了。

你开始跳过更多的日子，接下来你就会回到原点。

听起来很熟悉吗？应该这样，因为这种事情经常发生。

这就是为什么只有8%的人能够坚持他们的新年决心。

我们大多数人陷入的陷阱是，我们把太多的精力集中在日常工作中应该如何努力上。

相反，我们应该专注于简单的露面。

事实上，一个每天去健身房只锻炼十分钟的人，会比一个每次只锻炼一半、两个甚至三个小时的人更快地达到自动状态。

这是因为唯一能让你更接近自动性的是一致性。

让我再次重复一遍，唯一能让你更接近于把你的关键习惯变成你毫不费力就能自动完成的事情的是一致性。

基本上，你多久出现一次。

现在很多人可能在想，“好吧，只锻炼十分钟有什么意义？”如果我只锻炼10分钟，我就不可能减肥或增肌。

你是对的，但只是在某种程度上，因为让我们的习惯达到自动化的程度是我们的首要目标。

但从这些关键习惯中获得好处也很重要。

这就是为什么如果你想充分利用你的基本习惯，你需要实现我喜欢称之为“低-高”的标准。

以下是它的工作原理。

低门槛是你能做的最少量的工作，这仍然会让你的习惯更接近自动性。

这意味着你至少需要遵循你日常生活中的所有步骤，但你可以毫不费力地做到这一点。

例如，假设你正试图把冥想变成一种习惯。

这方面的低标准可以是坐在你一直坐的正确的冥想姿势，将你的时钟设置为你一直设置的数字，并专注于你的呼吸一分钟。

如果你认为在意志力不强的一天里，一分钟对你来说太难了，你甚至可以把它降到30秒。

这其实并不重要，因为你仍然在遵循你日常生活中的所有步骤，这意味着你仍然离自动线越来越近。

现在，高标准最终会让你从习惯中获益。

这是你允许自己做的最多的工作。

所以，让我们以前面的冥想习惯为例。

这个程序的最高标准可能是专注于你的呼吸长达20分钟。

这意味着你可以在任何地方冥想，从一分钟（你的低标准）到二十分钟（你的高标准）。

现在你可能在想“好吧，这是怎么回事？我为什么要限制自己？”

高低杠非常有效，有两个原因。

第一，无论出于何种原因，如果你的意志力很低，它都会让你非常容易完成你的日常生活。

仅仅冥想30秒的任务不足以吓到你的大脑保持意志力。

因此，有一个低门槛可以防止你错过你通常会错过的日子。

这一点至关重要，因为你错过的每一天都会阻碍你朝着自动线前进。

只错过一天也会导致我们错过更多的日子，尤其是在我们养成习惯之旅的开始。

因此，通过为我们的日常生活设定一个低标准，我们可以避免可能会让我们回到原点的巨大挫折。

低-高标准如此有效的第二个原因是，通过为你的日常生活设定一个高标准，即使在你的意志力水平极低的日子里，你也会有动力做比最低标准更多的事情。

这是因为，正如我在之前的视频中提到的，穿上鞋子、出门和去健身房实际上需要比实际锻炼本身更多的意志力。

幸运的是，你知道低门槛，如果你实现了，这意味着你几乎总是会出现。

这意味着你实际上只是克服了日常生活中最困难的部分。

既然你对这个常规有很高的要求，我几乎可以保证你会发现自己在想“好吧，我花了这么多时间和精力来到这里，我还不如多锻炼一会儿。”。“我的最大锻炼时间是一个半小时，所以让我们试着锻炼30分钟，而不是5分钟。

这很有趣，因为乍一看，高低杠听起来像作弊。

这听起来像是一条捷径，因为它确实如此。

它能让你比其他传统方法更快、更有效地达到自动化程度。

好吧所以，我们最后要讨论的是奖励。

在你的习惯循环结束时，需要有一个值得奖励的东西。

否则，你的大脑就没有理由记录这个循环。

为什么它要记住对你没有任何好处的东西？

您的奖励必须满足两个要求。

第一个要求是奖励必须立即到达，或者至少在常规之后很快到达。

比方说，你正在努力养成锻炼的习惯。

如果你告诉自己，锻炼的回报是三个月后你会看起来更好，那是一个糟糕的回报。

因为你大脑中负责养成习惯的部分不会将这种奖励与你的日常生活联系起来。太远了。

这里有一个即时奖励的好例子。

当我养成锻炼的习惯时，我会马上请自己吃一顿美味的饭，比如美味的牛排或一大碗咖喱。

这是一个很好的奖励，因为它紧跟在我的日常活动之后，正因为如此，我的大脑开始将我的日常锻炼与食物的奖励联系起来。

如果你这样做得当，你应该在日常生活中开始注意到小的食欲。

在养成锻炼习惯的同时，我开始思考我之后要吃的食物。

这是一个非常好的迹象，因为你的大脑越是将奖励与特定的日常活动联系起来，你就越接近自动性。

好的奖励的第二个要求是它必须是令人愉快的。

假设你正在努力养成每天读书的习惯，而你对这个习惯的奖励就是“知识”

这是一个可怕的奖励，因为尽管知识是好的，可以很容易地带来更幸福的生活，但它本身并没有那么令人愉快。

你可以做的是把成就感作为奖励，并在读完后专注于此。

现在，成就感还可以，它会完成任务的。

但如果你想在养成习惯方面取得最大成功，如果你想让自己的习惯让人感到兴奋，最好坚持我喜欢称之为原始奖励的方式。

原始奖励是数百万年来一直值得奖励的东西，数百万年来，食物、性、游戏、社交等活动过去是，现在仍然是我们最重要的活动之一。

这些稀释剂确保了我们基因的生存，正因为如此，它们进化成了非常令人愉快的。

因此，与其把知识的回报甚至成就感分配给你的日常阅读，不如分配一些游戏或放松之类的东西。

例如，你可以说“如果我按惯例阅读，我可以放松一下，然后看一集我最喜欢的电视节目”。看你最喜欢的节目既有趣又愉快，这是一个很好的奖励。

所以，简单回顾一下所有事情，首先你想挑选一个你每天都会遇到的独特提示，把这个独特提示分配给你独特的日常生活。

同样重要的是要注意，这个提示应该让你更容易立即跟进你的日常生活。

接下来，你想弄清楚你日常生活的步骤。

你一定要去什么地方吗？有什么你必须设置的吗？你是做什么的？

无论是什么，都要确定每一步。

这样做之后，我们现在可以为这个例程创建一个高低杠。

你的低门槛应该很容易，你不可能想出不做的借口。

简单的事情，比如做一个俯卧撑。

你的高标准应该是你认为自己在完美的一天所做的量，比如一百个俯卧撑。

最后，你想签署一份奖励，在你的日常生活结束后立即收到，这也是非常愉快的。

如果你很难想出好的奖励，你总是可以使用我之前提到的一种原始奖励，比如食物、游戏或社交。

你现在拥有了开始养成你的关键习惯所需的一切。

所以，我希望你们现在要做的是坐下来仔细思考你的提示，你的常规动作的高低标准，你的奖励，并把所有这些都写在下面的评论中。

写出来很重要，因为这就是你从今天开始要遵循的内容，直到你达到这个习惯的自动性。

In the previous lessons, we covered a strategy for this course which is to replace your bad habits with good keystone habits.

Then we discussed how habits work, debunked a couple of misconceptions, three of the most powerful habits you can adopt.

So, by now, you should have a habit in mind that you’re going to work on for the remainder of this course.

In today’s lesson, we’re going to talk about how to properly start forming your habit.

We’re going to cover how to strategically pick a cue, how to structure your routine so that you get closer to the line of automaticity with half the effort, and finally how to effectively reward yourself so that your habit sticks.

This is without a doubt one of the most important parts in this course, so make sure you pay close attention.

All right, let’s get started.

Rember, the cue is what triggers your brain to follow through with the routine and reach that reward.

So, it’s important to pick a cue that appears every single day.

Because if you pick a cue like waking up to the sun shining on your face, sure, you’ll stick to your habit most of the time.

But if it’s ever raining outside, you won’t be prompted to follow through with your routine.

At the same time, you want to pick a cue that is unavoidable.

Your cue needs to be something that you encounter every day, no matter where you are, what you’re doing, or even how you’re feeling.

For example, the cue for my habit of reading is eating.

Whenever I eat, I pick up a book or read some informative article online.

This cue is something that I do every single day without fail, and it’s unavoidable.

I could be sick; I could be in another country. It doesn’t matter because I’ll still have to eat.

Other unavoidable cues that you can consider for your own habit are things like showering, brushing your teeth, logging onto your computer or even your commute back from work.

There’s tons of possibilities and it doesn’t really matter what you select as long as your cue is something that appears every single day without fail.

Another thing you want to keep in mind is that your cue should make it possible for you to follow through with your routine immediately.

Let’s say, for example, the keystone habit you’ve selected is meditation.

It may not be smart to attach this routine to the cue of, say, arriving at work.

Some difficulties may arise if you plan to spend your first ten minutes of work every day meditating, your boss might interrupt and give you an assignment, and behold, you’ll get sidetracked and completely forget to meditate.

What you want to do is pick a cue that makes it easier for you to follow through with your routine.

For example, if the keystone habit you’re trying to build is fitness, it’s extremely effective to sign up for a gym that is on your commute from work.

That way, when you travel back from work, you’ll naturally come across your cue, which is seeing the gym.

This cue is great because when you see it, you’re only seconds away from starting your routine.

The final thing I want to note when it comes to picking a cue is that you want to pick a single cue.

You want your brain to associate a single unique cue with a single unique routine.

It half the time you’re using cue A and the other half you’re using cue You’re basically building two habits at the same time.

And because of this, it can take you twice as long to reach the line of automaticity, which again is that point in time where you no longer even have to think about doing your habit.

All right, so the next thing we’re going to talk about is the routines.

Now there’s huge problem with the way that the majority of people look at their routines.

See, most people who start a new habit set their expectations for their routine very, very high.

They tell themselves that they’ll work out for at least an hour and a half, five times a week, that they’ll meditate every single day for at least twenty minutes, that they’ll finish reading at least a book every single week.

If you expect to perform this well every single day, you’re eventually going to bump into some problems somewhere down the line. It could be a week; it could be a month.

There’s going to be a day where you have low levels of willpower.

It could be because you’re sick. It could be because you drank too much the previous night. It could even be because you’ve been working too much.

Whatever it is, these bad days are unavoidable.

Now we’re going to dive deeper into the concept of willpower later on in this course, but for now, I just want you to remember these two facts about willpower.

The first fact is that if your habit is still new, it requires a decent amount of willpower to stick to it.

The closer your habit gets to the line of automaticity, the less willpower it will require.

The second fact is that our brain tries its best to conserve willpower.

So, when your willpower levels drop below a certain threshold, it will do everything in its power to try to conserve it.

Okay, so your willpower levels are low and you’re traveling back from work and you see your gym, which is your cue and this means that you have to work out for an hour and a half.

What’s your brain going to do?

Your brain is going to say there’s no way we can work out for an hour and a half with this nearly empty tank of willpower.

And I can just about guarantee you that he’s going to convince you not to go.

So, you end up going home to binge-watch the new season of Stranger Things while eating Doritos.

You wake up the next morning feeling terrible and guilty because you’ve technically broken your New Year’s resolution.

Your motivation to go to the gym just isn’t the same anymore.

You start skipping more days and next thing you know, you’re back to square one.

Sound familiar? Well, it should, because this sort of thing happens all of the time.

This is why only 8% of people manage to stick to their New Year’s resolution.

The trap that most of us fall into is that we focus way too much energy on how hard we should work during our routines.

Instead, we should be focusing on simply showing up.

In fact, someone who goes to the gym every single day and works out for only ten minutes will get to the line of automaticity much faster than someone who shows up half as much but works out for one-two even three hours at a time.

This is because the only thing that will get you closer to the line of automaticity is consistency.

Let me repeat that again, the only thing that will get you closer to making that keystone habit of yours into something you do automatically without any effort is consistency.

Basically, how often you show up.

Now a lot of are probably thinking, “well, what’s the point of working out for only ten minutes? “There’s no way I can lose any weight or put on any muscle if I only work out for ten minutes.

And you’re right, but only to some extent because getting our habits to the line of automaticity is our number one goal.

But reaping the benefits of these keystone habits is also important.

That’s why if you want to get the most out of your keystone habits, you need to implement something I like to call the low-high bar.

Here’s how it works.

The low bar is the least amount of work you can do that will still move your habit closer to the line of automaticity.

This means that you need to at least follow all of the steps of your routine, but you’re allowed to do so with minimal effort.

For example, let’s say that you’re trying to make meditation into a habit.

The low bar for this could be sitting in the proper meditation position that you always sit in, setting your clock to the number you always set it to and focusing on your breathing for just one minute.

If you think one minute is too hard for you on a day with low willpower, you can even lower it to thirty seconds.

It doesn’t really matter because you’re still following all of the steps of your routine and this means you’re still getting closer to the line of automaticity.

Now the high bar is what eventually causes you to reap the benefits of your habits.

It is the most amount of work you allow yourself to do.

So, let’s take the previous example of our meditation habit.

The high bar for this routine could be focusing on your breathing for up to twenty minutes.

This means that you’re allowed to meditate for anywhere from one minute which is your low bar to twenty minutes which is your high bar.

Now you’re probably thinking “Well, how does this even work? Why would I ever want to limit myself? “The low-high bar works extremely well because of two reasons.

Number one, it makes it extremely easy for you to complete your routine if for whatever reason you have low will power.

The task of meditating for just thirty seconds isn’t enough to scare your brain into conserving its willpower.

So having a low bar prevents you from missing days you normally would of.

This is crucial because every single day you miss sets back your progress towards that line of automaticity.

Missing just one day also tends to cause us to miss even more days, especially in the beginning of our habit-building journey.

So, by setting a low bar for our routine, we can avoid massive setbacks that would have likely thrown us back to square one.

The second reason the low-high bar is so effective is because by having a high bar for your routine, you’ll be motivated to do more than the bare minimum even on days where your levels of willpower are extremely low.

This is because like I mentioned in the previous videos, it actually takes more willpower to put on your shoes, head out the door, and go to the gym than the actual workout itself.

Luckily you know about the low bar, which if you implement means you will almost always show up.

This means that you’re actually just overcome the hardest part of the routine.

And since you have a high bar for this routine, I can almost guarantee that you’ll find yourself thinking” Well, I spent so much time and energy getting here, I might as well work out a bit longer. “My maximum for working out is an hour and a half, so let’s try to do thirty minutes instead of just five.

It’s funny because at first glance, the low-high bar sounds like cheating.

It sounds like a shortcut and that’s because it is.

It gets you to that line of automaticity faster and more efficiently than other conventional methods.

All right. So, the last thing we’re going to talk about is the reward.

There needs to be a prize that’s worthwhile at the end of your habit loop.

Otherwise, your brain has no reason to record this loop.

Why should it remember something that doesn’t benefit you in any way?

There are two requirements that your reward must fill.

The first requirement is that the reward must arrive immediately, or at least very soon after the routine.

Let’s say, for example, that you’re trying to build a habit of working out.

If you tell yourself that your reward for working out is that you’ll look better three months down the line, that’s a bad reward.

Because the part of your brain that’s responsible for building habits will not associate that reward with your routine. It’s too far away.

Here’s a good example of an immediate reward.

When I was building my habit of working out, I would treat myself to a fantastic meal right after, something like a delicious steak or a large bowl of curry.

This is a good reward because it comes immediately after my routine, and because of this, my brain starts to associate my routine of working out with the reward of food.

If you’re doing this properly, you should start noticing small cravings during your routine.

While building my habit of working out, I started to catch myself thinking about the food I would eat right after.

And that’s a very good sign, because the more your brain associates a reward with a specific routine, the closer you are to that line of automaticity.

The second requirement for a good reward is that it has to be pleasurable.

Let’s say that you’re trying to build a habit of reading books every day, and the reward you assign for this habit is “knowledge.”

This is a terrible reward because although knowledge is good and can easily lead to a happier life, it in itself is not that pleasurable.

What you could do is assign the feeling of accomplishment as the reward and focus on that when you finish your reading.

Now, the feeling of accomplishment is okay, and it’ll do the job.

But if you want to have the most success in building your habits, if you want your habits to feel exciting, it’s best to stick to what I like to call primitive rewards.

Primitive rewards are things that have always been rewarding tracing back for millions, and millions of years things like food, sex, play, socializing were and still are some of the most important activities for us.

These thins ensured the survival of our genes and because of this, they’ve evolved to become extremely pleasurable.

So instead of assigning the reward of knowledge or even the feeling of accomplishment to your routine of reading, it’s a lot more effective to assign something like play or relaxation.

For example, you could say “If I do my routine of reading, I can relax and watch an episode of my favorite TV show right after”. Watching your favorite shows is fun and pleasurable and that makes it a pretty good reward.

So just to recap on everything, first you want to pick a single unique cue that you come across every single day without fail, assign this single unique cue to your unique routine.

It’s also important to note that this cue should make it easier for you to follow up immediately with your routine.

Next, you want to figure out the steps of your routine.

Do you have to go somewhere? Is there something that you have to set up? What do you do?

Whatever it is, identify each and every single step.

After doing so, we can now create a low-high bar for this routine.

Your low bar should be so easy that it’s impossible for you to come up with excuses to not do it.

Something easy like doing one pushup.

Your high bar should be an amount that you see yourself doing on a perfect day, something like a hundred push-ups.

And finally, you want to sign a reward that you can receive immediately after your routine that is also very pleasurable.

If you’ve having trouble thinking of good rewards, you can always just use one of the primitive rewards I mentioned before, like food, play, or socializing.

You now have everything you need to start building your keystone habit.

So, what I want you guys to do right now is to sit down and carefully think about your cue, your low-high bar for your routine, your reward, and write all of that down in the comments below.

It is important that you write this out because this is what you’ll be following starting today util you reach that line of automaticity for this habit.

I’ll include an example in in the comments below and I’ll also try my best to provide constructive criticism for as many of you as possible.

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