写在前面
长大之后，在社交媒体的推波助澜下，这种情况愈演愈烈， 无数人终生都困在比较的漩涡之中（be caught up in the comparison loop）。
很多人不自觉地认为，「比同龄人好」远远比「自己好」更重要。即使自己一路走到现在，已经非常优秀、非常不容易了，但一旦稍稍落后于同龄人，依然会陷入严重的自我怀疑。
那么，我们如何停止与他人比较呢？今天想跟大家分享@Malama Life的一则视频：How to stop comparing yourself to others。
希望能给大家带来一些启发~ 我特别喜欢她的发音，自然、舒服、平和，很适合进行跟读和复述练习。
我分别做了无字幕版和英文字幕版，大家可以先挑战一下无字幕版，再带着问题看字幕，学习后文的语言点讲解。
在讲解过程中，我不会就词讲词，还会串联一些我以前积累的地道表达一起讲解。
同时，我也附上外刊、美剧、其他vlog里的例句，让大家借助不同语境更深刻地体会词汇表达的内涵，在口语和写作里才能精准输出~
我们再来看看视频里值得学习的语言点：
01
如何表达「比不过...」？
This is something I've had to work really hard on, but I still feel jealous at times, and feel my old insecurities rise to the surface, when I feel like I don't measure up to something or someone, who's further along on my path.
🪴at times 和 sometimes 一样，指「有时，偶尔」，大家可以替换使用。
... but I still feel jealous at times. 即「但有时依然会嫉妒别人」。
我们来随手造个句：
Daily life may feel mundane at times, but I love to feel the subtle beauty and take comfort in simplicity.
🪴measure up to sb 指「比得过某人」(to be good enough, or as good as someone or something else)。
don't measure up to sb 便指「比不过某人」。
measure up to sth 指「达到」某个标准、「符合」...预期。
比如：She could never measure up to her mother's expectations.
她可能永远都无法满足她母亲的期望。
02
如何表达「一...，就...」？
But the moment I compare myself to a peer, who seems to be doing better than me, it invalidates everything I built for myself.
很多同学一想到「一...就...」，第一反应就是as soon as，下次我们在口语里，也可以替换成the moment that...
大家想想看下面这句话用英文怎么说？
他说我一到家就给你打电话。
👉He said he would phone you the moment he got home.
If had my own money, which I don't, that money would belong to my husband the moment we got married.
🪴invalidate [ɪnˈvælɪdeɪt] 由in（无）+valid（有效的）+date合成，指「使...没有价值，使...站不住脚」(to prove that an opinion, argument, etc. is wrong)。
invalidate everything I built for myself 便指「让自己构建的一切作废」。
invalidate 后面还可以跟法律、合同等等，指「使...无效，使...作废」。
举个《经济学人》里的例子：
The European Court of Justice invalidated that law in 2014, after numerous countries challenged it in court, saying that it interfered with “the fundamental rights to respect for private life”.
2014年，欧洲法院宣布该法无效，因为许多国家在法庭上对它提出质疑，称它干涉了“尊重私人生活的基本权利”。
🪴反义词为validate，指「证实，使...合法化，使...生效」。
举个《英文系主任》里的例子：
Yeah, I'm not about to validate the total absurdity of this proceeding.
🪴名词形式为validation [ˌvæli'deiʃən]，如果要表达「外界的认可」，我们就可以说external validation。
As I enter my early adulthood, I’m proud of the work I’ve done to cope with pressure by bolstering my self-esteem and minimizing my need for external validation.随着步入成年，我能够依靠提升自尊和减少对外界认可的需求来应对压力，对此我感到十分自豪。
03
如何表达两个人「相差...岁」？
We're only two years part, so naturally our families would always compare us to each other.
Our birthdays are exactly a month apart.
04
如何表达「出于好意」？
And even if I know that it was with good intentions, it was sometimes really hurtful.
🪴 with good intentions 指「带着好意」。
这句话咱们可以直接积累下来：
Even if I know that it is / was with good intentions, it ...
尽管我知道那是出于好意的，但是...
我们也可以说：
Even if sb has good intentions, ...
尽管某人是好意，但是...
Even if I know that it is with good intentions, her constant advice can sometimes be overwhelming.
类似的表达还有：
sb comes from a good place.
sb means well.
sth is done with the best of intentions.
sb / sth is well-intentioned.
这些词都可以表示「出于好心」。
大家重点记一个就行。
I know that they came from a good place, but sometimes I felt really hurt.
Even if I know that they meant well, sometimes I felt really hurt.
I know that it was well-intentioned, it was sometimes really hurtful.
Look, you're coming from a good place.
I‘m sure he means well.
I'm sure you mean well.
Today such children will spend most of their time indoors, often with adults rather than with siblings or friends, be supervised more closely, be driven everywhere rather than walk or cycle, take part in many more organised activities and, probably for several hours every day, engage with a screen of some kind. All this is done with the best of intentions.
今天，孩子们大部分时间都待在室内，通常是和成年人而不是兄弟姐妹或朋友在一起，被更密切地监督，去哪里都有 ⻋接送而不是自己走路或骑⻋，参加多得多的有组织的活动，还很可能每天都要花几个小时在某种屏幕前面。而所有 这一切都是出于最好的意图。
新规则本是用心良苦。国家援助会扭曲竞争，而内部纾困的目的则是保护纳税人不用为银行倒闭买单。
05
如何表达「适用于...」？
It's just impossible to compare two completely different things, let alone two unique and complex human beings. This doesn't just apply to my sister and me, but also to all of us.
🪴 sth applies to sb. 指「... 适用于某人」(to have an effect on or to concern a particular person, group, or situation)。
sth does not just apply to A, but also to B. 便指「...不仅适用于A，也适用于B」。
not just 和not only, not merely一样，表示「不仅」。
我们现学现卖，联系「职场歧视」话题造个句：
Many companies are still failing to offer women equal opportunities. This does not only apply to pay, but also to opportunities to develop careers.
许多公司仍然未能为妇女提供平等的机会。这不仅体现在薪酬方面，还体现在职业发展机会方面。
06
如何强调「每一个方面都...」？
in every possible way 是一个高频词组，指「在任何一个可能的方面」，也就是强调「每一个方面」。
07
如何表达「活在某人的阴影里」？
But it was really difficult for me to know this at a young age, because I always felt like I was living in her shadows.
live in one's shadow 指「活在...的阴影下」。我们也可以说live under one's shadow。
比如：A younger son often lives in the shadow of his elder brother.弟弟往往生活在哥哥的阴影下。
08
如何形容某种感觉「悄悄出现」？
That's when the insecurities and dissatisfaction with our own lives will creep in slowly.
因此，短语creep in 表示「不知不觉地出现」(If something creeps in or creeps back, it begins to occur or becomes part of something without people realizing or without them wanting it)，主语常常是不好的事物，尤其是负面情绪。
比如：Insecurity might creep in. 可能会不知不觉地产生不安全感。
What was once exciting and new becomes old-hat；regret creeps in.曾经令人兴奋又新奇的东西变得陈旧过时，懊悔悄然而至。
🪴 如果我们想表达某种情绪、感受「很强烈，深入人心」。
我们可以说sth runs deep。
比如：Her love for basketball runs deep. That's for sure. 她对篮球爱得深沉，这是肯定的。
再比如外媒一篇关于台剧《不够善良的我们》的文章有这样一句话：
But jealousy runs deep between their characters.
她们在剧中饰演的角色对彼此非常嫉妒。
此时run 是一个系动词，指「变得」，相当于become，后面常跟形容词。
我们可以说 feel a surge of sth。
举个英剧《生命不息》里的例子：
She felt a surge of victory.
再比如：She felt a sudden surge of anger. 她突然感觉怒火中烧。
He was overcome by a sudden surge of jealousy. 他突然妒火中烧。
09
如何形容一个人「什么都好」？
She is a straight-A student, very beautiful, incredibly talented in everything she pursues, just has everything going for her. But my path didn't always look like hers.
中间everything 也可以换成a lot, nothing等词。
再举个例子：
You're young, intelligent, attractive—you have a lot going for you!
10
如何表达「刷社交媒体」？
🪴 a highlight reel of sth
a reel of sth 本来是「一卷...」。比如：a reel of film 一卷胶卷 👇
a highlight reel of one's lives 便可以理解为「某人生活里高光时刻的展示」，非常形象的一个表达。
Social media is just a highlight reel of everybody's lives. 这句话大家可以直接背下来，用来表达「社交媒体只会展示每个人生活里的高光时刻」。
我在另一则vlog的评论区里也碰到了这个词，这句话说得非常好：
🪴 scroll 本来是指用来书写文件的「长卷纸」或者「卷轴」，因为它特别长，所以阅读时需要让它在手上不断向前滚动，直到读完所有信息。
我们在手机或电脑屏幕上阅读长文时也是如此，用手指或鼠标让信息不断向上滚动，这个动作也叫scroll，即「滚屏阅览」，也就是我们常说的「刷…」，中英文说法都非常形象。
I was scrolling through TikTok videos and before I knew it, it was two am in the morning!
我们再来看个美剧里的例子：
It takes me, like, an hour to scroll through everything.
这里perfectly curated images 便指「精心拍摄的图片」。
精心打造的人设：a carefully curated persona
The carefully curated personas and well crafted images that users see on social media can create unrealistic expectations and contribute to feelings of inadequacy and low self-worth.
我还联想到另一个词组，get one's life together。
get sth together 指「调整...」。我们既可以说get one's life together 调整好生活，也可以说get oneself together 把自己调整好，有点类似于现在流行说的「支棱起来」。
我们再来看两个美剧里的例子：
I'm not gonna apologize for getting my life together.
11
如何表达「为...自豪」？
I actually pride myself on not being easily persuaded, but I have also been very much influenced by social media.
We are still a school that prides itself on excellence.
You know, I pride myself on solving people's problems.
比如：You can congratulate yourself on having done an excellent job. 你应该为你出色的工作感到自豪。
在因为自己比祖先更开明而沾沾自喜之前，我们要谨记这一点。
You don't need to congratulate someone on being gay.
12
如何表达「让人空虚」？
We can it "keeping up with the Joneses" or "the comparison trap", but the point is, it's gonna leave us feeling really empty, because we're just ultimately chasing an illusion.
🪴leave sb feeling adj. 便指「让某人感觉...」。
leave sb feeling really empty 即「让某人感到非常空虚」。
再举个外刊里的例子👇
注意小词leave这里的用法， 表示「让某人处于...状态」，其后不仅可以跟现在分词doing sth，也可跟形容词、介词、过去分词等等。
举个英剧《万物既伟大又渺小》里的例子：
We would never leave animals in distress.
🪴 keep up the Joneses 是个习语，指「攀比，比排场，比阔气」(to try to have all the possessions and social achievements that your friends and neighbours have)。
如果我们想表达某人「陷入」比较的陷阱，可以用动词短语：
get caught up in, be caught up in 都可表示「陷入」。
我们来看两个美剧里的例子：
My point is, I don't believe she has a political agenda.
My point is, I'm not afraid to die.
13
如何表达「好胜心很强」？
However, solely basing our decision and our self-worth on others can undoubtedly have a negative impact. It can make us second guess our decisions, make us jealous or competitive.
🪴 sth can undoubtedly have a negative impact. 指「某事物无疑会产生负面影响」。
undoubtedly一词加强了语气。这个句式口语和写作里都可以用。
拿「外卖」话题造个句：
Eating takeaways every day can undoubtedly have a negative impact.
competitive 形容商品或服务时，指「有竞争力的」。
competitive 形容市场时，指「竞争激烈的」。
我们来几个英美剧里的例子：
You are still the most competitive person I have ever met.
I don't know how competitive the election was, but thank you.
🍰话题词汇
不安全感：insecurities
浮现：rise to the surface
不知不觉出现：creep in
比不过某人：don't measure up to sb
让...没有价值：invalidate
认可...：validate sb / sth
外界的认可：external validation
相差...岁：... years apart
出于好意：
sth is with good intentions.sb has good intentions.
sb comes from a good place.
sb means well.
sth is done with the best of intentions.
sb / sth is well-intentioned.
活在某人的阴影里：live in / under one's shadow
某人的缺点：sb's shortcomings
某人什么都好：have everything going for sb / sth
刷社交媒体：scroll through social media
社交媒体只会展示每个人生活里的高光时刻：
Social media is just a highlight reel of everybody's lives.精心拍摄的图片：perfectly curated images
把生活过得井井有条：have sb's whole life put together, get one's life together
把自己调整好：get oneself together
自豪于...：pride oneself on sth ≈ be proud of sth
攀比：keep up the Joneses
让人感觉空虚：leave sb feeling really empty
好胜心和嫉妒心强：jealous and competitive
怀疑自己的决定：second guess one's own decisions
🍰 高频词组
有时，偶尔：at times ← sometimes
一...就...：The moment ..., ...
适用于某人：apply to sb
...不仅适用于A，也适用于B：
sth does not just / only apply to A, but also to B.更不用说：let alone ....
每一个方面：in every possible way
某事物无疑会产生负面影响：
sth can undoubtedly have a negative impact.
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词、句、篇、题逐个剖析，
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词汇、语法、逻辑、写作表达、通通拿下。
