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In a deeply emotional post on Xiaohongshu (RedNote), a British woman named Poppy McPeake shared her story of searching for her biological parents, a journey that began with hope but took an unexpected turn after reading the responses from netizens.
McPeake, who was adopted from China at the age of four, received mixed reactions from online users, some of whom advised her against pursuing contact with her birth parents. After reflecting on their feedback, McPeake decided to let go of her desire to trace her biological roots, finding solace in the life she has built with her adoptive family.
McPeake’s post revealed that she was born in Jiangxi Province, in 2002, and was adopted by her family in the United Kingdom in July 2006. As someone who has grown up knowing the love and care of her adoptive family, she said in her post that she has always been curious about her biological parents and the circumstances that led to her adoption. However, she never imagined the emotional rollercoaster her search would create.
Following the post, McPeake received a range of comments, many of which cautioned her about the potential consequences of reaching out to her birth parents. Some netizens were empathetic, offering advice grounded in their own experiences or cultural beliefs. Others, however, had more pointed concerns.
One commenter, with the username 巧克力慕斯卷 (Chocolate Mousse Roll), expressed concern that her biological parents may have abandoned her due to the one-child policy. They also suggested that her parents may have treated her as a mere transaction, as she was likely seen as a burden at the time of her birth. The commenter speculated that, if McPeake were to contact her birth parents, they might only be seeking financial support, possibly targeting her as a source of funds because she now lives in the UK. This viewpoint resonated with several other users who echoed similar concerns.
One reply from another user, 404, pointed out that her biological parents had made the decision to abandon her, and suggested that she focus on living a good life, rather than searching for people who had seemingly chosen to let her go. 张雅雅雅雅雅雅 (Zhang Yaya), another commenter, questioned why McPeake would want to reconnect with parents who had already made the choice to give her up, suggesting that it could only cause emotional distress.
A user named momo shared a sentiment that resonated with many, citing a popular Chinese saying: “亲生大于手足” (biological parents are more important than siblings). They emphasized that the love and care McPeake has received from her adoptive family should be cherished, and advised her to let go of the attachment to her birth parents. This idea was echoed by others who encouraged McPeake to embrace her current life and family, rather than clinging to a past that may not offer the emotional fulfillment she hopes for.
On the other hand, some responses were more neutral, suggesting that McPeake focus on enjoying her life in the UK and not be consumed by the search for her biological roots. A user with the name 饭卡卡卡卡 (Food Card) advised her to “know that you are living well abroad” and not let the past overshadow her present happiness. Similarly, 你好好好好好 (Hello Good Good) encouraged her to give up the search and concentrate on making the most of her life in the UK.
Ultimately, the overwhelming response from netizens caused McPeake to reflect on her motivations for searching for her birth parents. In an updated post, she thanked everyone for their well-meaning advice, explaining that their comments had made her realize that her desire to reconnect with her biological parents was not as strong as it had been. She thanked those who had shown concern for her well-being, and wished everyone a good life.
Her final message on Xiaohongshu read: “Thank you all for your kind suggestions! After reading your comments, I no longer feel the same desire to find my biological parents, but I am deeply grateful for your care and thoughtfulness. I hope everyone here can have a wonderful life!”
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