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In a recent viral video from Henan, a woman shed light on rural matchmaking trends, sparking widespread discussion online. According to her, rural areas are witnessing a unique phenomenon where divorced women with children - especially daughters - are highly sought after in the matchmaking market. Surprisingly, their dowries (bride prices) often exceed those of women marrying for the first time.
The woman described rural matchmaking practices where several men might meet one prospective bride in a so-called "group interview" format. She explained that divorced women with daughters are more popular than those with sons. Matchmakers even pitch this as a selling point, arguing that having children proves a woman’s fertility - a significant factor for families looking for future heirs.
“A divorced woman with a child, especially a daughter, is seen as a safer choice,” the woman explained in the video. “Matchmakers often tell potential grooms, ‘If you marry a woman without children, there’s no guarantee she can conceive. If she can’t, you’ll have to spend money on treatments. But if she already has a child, she’s proven she can give you a family.’”
The video garnered heated reactions, with many sharing their observations and frustrations about rural matchmaking practices.
One user noted the economic rationale: “Daughters cost less than sons. Sons require more money for education, housing, and marriage, while daughters are expected to bring in a dowry when they marry.”
Another comment shed light on the demographic challenges in rural areas: “In some villages, there are 40 or 50 bachelors aged 30 to 50. Younger women either marry early or move to cities for education and never return.”
However, some found the trend disheartening. “It’s all about finding a womb to bear children,” one person remarked. “There’s no love or connection involved. People are willing to marry strangers after a single meeting as long as the financial terms are met.”
Another added: “Matchmakers are manipulating the system to inflate dowries and promote these second marriages. It’s all about profit.”
The discussion also brought attention to extreme cases. One commenter shared a satirical story about a woman in their village who had been married and divorced seven times, bringing up nine daughters. Despite this, she reportedly secured a marriage with a wealthy businessman 20 years her junior, receiving an extravagant dowry that included luxury homes, cars, and even private islands.
Others highlighted practical realities. A user recounted: “In my village, a divorced woman with a 12-year-old son remarried within three days of returning home. Her family negotiated a dowry of 280,000 yuan ($38,500), partly to help her brother afford a bride from Myanmar.”
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