微信改版后,即使是你订阅的公众号,如果不加星标,被看到的概率也会大大降低。所以大家别忘了动动小手,到我的公号首页给我加上“星标”哦。
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"Every encounter is a surprise"
My heart is drenched in wine,
you'll be on my mind.
这是HENRY老师的第295篇原创
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2024中考近在咫尺(just around the corner),
许多教师,家长和学生对如何攻克作文这个霸道总裁如何深感迷茫(feel at a loss),
怎么实现弯道超车(corner overtaking)?
如何考试完成后体验“两岸猿声啼不住,轻舟已过万重山。”
而不是“念天地之悠悠,独怆然而涕下”?
注入灵魂:“乘风破浪会有时,直挂云帆济沧海。”
相信各位经过努力一定能凤凰涅槃,
阳光一定会地肆意地洒在你的身上(every inch of your skin),既慷慨又大方。
来一抹热播剧“今天的她们”梁总(佘诗曼)的迷人表情~
今天Henry老师带大家一起巧妙解读( have an in-depth analysis)
如何应对环保通知类应用文(practical text)?
看完瞬间有“内卷天花板”,不,会感觉命运的齿轮开始转动!
前方究!极!核!能!!!
(2024黄浦最新二模!!!)
内容完美解析:
1. 关注对象意识: 用第二人称 you 或:we arrange/organize ...for you
2. 关注重要元素: time + activity + purpose 重要!重要!重要! + reason
3. 关于photo show多样化的解读:体现了核心素养中思维品质的考察维度,允许有多样化的合理解读
HENRY本次的解析使你的
框架---更清晰
内容---更饱满
语言—更优美
以下为优化版正文:
It's time to celebrate Earth Day. You are welcome to join us!(原文)
We should check in from 8:00 to 8:30.
HENRY评析:注意对象意识(用you)和优化语言(should 优化为be supposed to)
改为:You are supposed to check in from 8:00 to 8:30 a.m.
From 9:00 to 10:00, we will join a drawing competition, and then we will select ten picture to give as a gift about the earth.
HENRY评析:英语多被动,中文多主动。建议把we will join a drawing competition改被动句,主动被动结合,句子妙笔生辉!give as a gift,请问give 给谁,对象不明!
改为:From 9:00 to 10:00, a drawing competition will be held. You can express what you are eager to do to protect the environment on the paper.
Next hour, we will have tree planting activity.
HENRY评析:一般不用next hour,太笼统。注意activity需要配备一下目的。顺便用结果状语从句,长短句结合,体现九年级毕业班优秀学生的水准。
改为:From 10:00-11:00, you will also take part in the tree planting activity so as to reduce the greenhouse effect.
After this, we will have lunch break.
HENRY评析:没有after this 的表达,之后内容稍显粗糙,建议丰富。
改为:After that, you will probably be a little exhausted and tired .We will arrange the lunch break for you.
In the afternoon, we will have a science experiment from 13:30 to 14:30.
HENRY评析:建议充实内容,并把句子重构
改为:From 13:30-14:30 some environmentally-friendly materials will be provided to help us conduct a science experiment.
Finally, you will enjoy a half hour photo show at 15 o'clock.
HENRY评析:注意对象意识、搭配以及阐述目的。
改为:Finally, you will enjoy a photo show about environmental protection to record the unforgettable moment.
I wish this event can be successfully held.
HENRY评析:I wish 慎用,是与现在事实相反。总结句需要补充。
改为:We sincerely hope that you will benefit a lot from this activity(获益匪浅). Your participation(参与) will definitely make a difference.
你学到了吗?
欢迎互动+点“在看”转发支持噢
二枚重磅彩蛋来袭!!!
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