一位门徒说：我发现若以一个人类来看待你，你是难以接近的。若以一种力量来看待你，你是强而有力的。
OSHBuddha：
(笑)但是你只能以其中一种身份来看待我。(片刻的暂停)我两者都是。
那正是人类头脑的问题：如果以一个人类的身分我太容易被接近的话，我能够为你做的许多事将变得不可能。这就是人类头脑的作用方式：它会将事情视为理所当然，然后外在变成了一切，却失去了内在。
是出于体贴我才变得难以接近。我以前是很容易接近的，但是我渐渐的觉得我无法帮助别人；要帮助别人几乎是不可能了。例如，如果我给你一小时的时间，你会谈论一些废话。如果我给你一分钟，你会说出你最需要的事──那就是头脑的作用方式。
如果你整天都可以来找我，你绝对不会来找我。如果你必须等上八至十天……为了让你转向自己、为了让你产生有意义的问题，那种等待是必需的。
有时候我发现如果你有问题，如果你可以马上来找我，你会带来一些琐碎的问题。在每天都会有无数的问题出现──它们其实没什么意义，但是在那一刻它们看起来意义非凡。如果你必须等一个小时，问题就会改变──然后你又会带来另一个问题。如果我允许你带所有的问题来，你就会变得一团糟，因为你将无法知道什么是必要的问题、什么是有意义的问题。所以这是整个过程的一部分。
每当我觉得你需要我时，我会找你。别担心，交给我，好吗？
[这位门徒说在昨天晚上的戈利仙卡静心的第二阶段，在闪光时他变得很偏执。]
嗯，它可能创造出恐惧……但是要允许它，不论发生什么事都要跟它在一起。别试着以任何方式改变它。你试着改变它的那一刻你就摧毁了它，你摧毁了它的美。
恐惧有它自己的美……有它自己的细致与感性。事实上它是种非常微妙的活力。这个字是负面的，但是这种感觉本身是非常正面的。只有活的东西才会害怕；死的东西是没有恐惧的。恐惧是活生生的、细致的、脆弱的一部分。
所以要允许恐惧存在。跟着它颤抖，让它动摇你的根基──并将它当成一种深刻的经验般的享受它。别对恐惧抱持任何态度……其实，你不要称它为恐惧。当你称它为恐惧的那一刻，你就已经采取了一种态度。你已经谴责了它，你已经说它是错的、它不该在那里。你已经在警戒，你已经在逃避、逃离。你已经以一种非常微妙的方式远离了它。所以别称它为恐惧。
这是最基本的一件事──停止给东西名称。只要看着它的感觉、它的样子。允许它，不要给它贴标签──保持无知。无知是一种了不起的静心状态。坚持无知，别让头脑来支配。别让头脑使用语言与文字、卷标与类别，因为头脑拥有这一整个过程。其中一件事会与另一件事连结，然后事情就会没完没了。
只是简单的看着──别称它为恐惧。要变得害怕与颤抖──那是很美的。躲在角落、藏在毛毯下颤抖。做动物们害怕时会做的事。小孩子害怕时会做什么？他会哭。或者一个原始人──他会做什么？他会跪下来向神祈祷──那是出自恐惧。
原始人的神比哲学家的神更生动，因为祂出自于一种深刻的生理上的需求、一种恐惧──对于未知的恐惧、对你四周的空无的恐惧、对一切事物的广阔的恐惧，你害怕你是个陌生人、你害怕有一天你将不存在……。只有原始人知道当他们被恐惧占据时，他们的头发将会竖立起来。文明人已经完全忘记了这种语言；它已经变成了一种譬喻。我们以为那只是随便说说而已，那不是真的。但是它的确发生过。如果你让恐惧占据你，你的头发将会竖立起来。然后你将会第一次了解恐惧是种多么美的现象。在那种骚动不安中、在那种飓风之中，你将会知道你的内在某处有一个点是绝对不会被触及的。如果恐惧无法触及它，那么死亡也无法触及它。四周都是黑暗与恐惧，只有一个小小的中心是绝对超越于它们的。不是你试着成为超越的──你只是让恐惧完全占据你──但是突然间你会察觉到这个对比。
所以如果恐惧、愤怒、悲伤或任何事情发生了，都要允许它存在。关上门，然后处于恐惧之中、放松于恐惧之中。只要表现得像个小孩一样，像那种不曾被训练为事情贴标签的小孩、像那种只是凭感觉而活却不会对事情有想法的小孩一样。恐惧是一扇门，从那里一个人可以进入自己的本质。
恐惧是最被压抑的事情之一。全人类、全世界都可以被分为两种类型：一种是对性压抑的人，另一种是对死亡压抑的人。一个社会不是压抑死亡就是压抑性。每当一个社会不压抑性、不害怕性，不将性视为禁忌，这个社会马上就会开始压抑死亡，因为死亡是相反的一极。所以如果你允许性，死亡就必须被压抑。如果你压抑性，那么就不会有对死亡的恐惧，你可以允许它。
在西方，自从佛洛伊德之后，性已经不是禁忌了；现在死亡变成了禁忌。而每当死亡变成了禁忌，恐惧就变成了被抑制的事情。当性是禁忌时，爱就变成了被抑制的事情。就像性与死亡的关系一样，爱与恐惧也是紧紧相连的。
如果你深入于静心，恐惧或爱就会变成一扇门。如果死亡被抑制了，那么恐惧将会是那扇门。如果性被抑制了，那么爱将会是那扇门。例如，在性被抑制的东方文明中，头脑在静心中面对的第一件事是爱、是一股高涨的性能量，因为被抑制的东西会自己伸展开来。
你没有任何对性的抑制，所以恐惧伸展开来了。被抑制的、被视为禁忌的事是死亡，所以你必须深深的放松，并允许它。一旦恐惧被允许了，它很快的会变成死亡；你将必须经历片刻的死亡。一旦性与死亡的禁忌被解除了，人类就自由了。
这两种把戏就是创造出人类束缚的把戏。一旦两者都不在了，你就自由了；不是你被解放──你本身就已经自由了。
事情一直都很好……要更允许它……。
嗯，如果你允许它，什么事都不会有。被允许的东西会消失，因为每件事的存在都是因为压抑。如果你压抑某件事，它就会存在，是你赋予了它的存在。如果你允许它，它就会渐渐消失。
[一位门徒说她并不想规律的静心，因为她并不想将自己置于某种架构中并让自己做任何事。]
不处于任何架构中是很好的，但是唯有你将自己置于某种架构中，你才能享受到那种自由，否则是不行的。你了解我的意思吗？从架构中解脱是很好的，但是唯有你身在架构中你才能够从中得到解脱。
所以首先要处在某种架构中，然后从中得到解脱。首先要修练自己，然后再跳出它──否则你永远不知道自由是什么。要了解自由，一个人应该住在监牢中几天──只是将它当做成长过程的一部分。然后你将真正了解到自由的滋味，因为它只有透过对比才能够被了解。
所以如果你听我的话，你就会将自己置于架构中一个月。只要遵守这整个例行公事，不要听头脑对你说你想做什么就做什么。在一个月之后我会让你自由……然后你将会了解自由的滋味，否则是不行的。
放纵并不是自由，放纵什么也不是。但是自由是种伟大的成就，它唯有透过修练才能达成。自由并不是修练，但是它要透过修练才能达成。
首先一个人必须自制──然后自由才是美好的。然后你才能够自动自发，并且永远不会让任何架构在你周围安定下来。但是首先要成为你自己。你的头脑不是你，头脑的任意并不是你自动自发──那是头脑的一种束缚。头脑本身就是最大的一座监牢。
所以你要花一个月的时间去做所有的静心，然后要完成下次的静心营。每天早上，不论演讲是英文还是印度文，你都必须参加。如果是印度文的演讲，你只要听我的声音──有时它会比任何的了解还要深入。因为你无法了解语言，你只是去听声音……那变成了一种静心。所以你每天早上都要参加──不能错过任何的演讲。还有在早上和傍晚的静心也都不能错过，好吗？
从明天就开始。明天是这个月的二十日，所以下个月的二十日我就会让你自由！花一个月的时间成为真正的囚犯，好吗？──而且要快乐一点，因为它将会带给你许多东西！
A sannyasin says: I find you inaccessible -- as a man. As a force I find you very powerful.
A：
(laughing) But you can know me only as one. (a pause) I am both.
That is the problem of the human mind: if I am too accessible as man, many things that I can do for you will not be possible. This is how the human mind functions: it takes things for granted, and then the outer becomes the whole and the inner is lost.
It is very considerately that I have become inaccessible. I was very accessible, but then by and by I began to feel that I couldn't help; it became almost impossible to help. For example, if I give you one hour, you talk rubbish. If I give you one minute you say exactly the thing that is needed -- that's how mind functions.
If I am available to you the whole day, I am not available at all. If you have to wait eight days or ten days, that waiting is needed for a certain tuning in yourself; for certain significant problems to arise.
Sometimes I see that if you have a problem and you can come immediately, you will bring me trivia. During the day there are a thousand and one problems arising --they are not significant, but in the moment they appear significant. If you have to wait just one hour, the problem changes -- then you bring another problem. If you are allowed to bring all your problems you will be in a mess, because you yourself will not be able to know what is needed, what is significant. So this is part of the whole process.
Whenever I feel that you need me I will call you. Don't be worried; leave it to me, mm?
[The sannyasin says he became paranoid during the flashing light, second stage, of the Gourishankar meditation the previous evening.]
Mm, it can create fear... but allow it, and whatsoever happens remain with it. Don't try to change it in any way. The moment you try to change anything you destroy it, and you destroy the beauty of it.
Fear has a beauty of its own... a delicacy and a sensitivity of its own. In fact it is a very subtle aliveness. The word is negative, but the feeling itself is very positive. Only alive processes can be afraid; a dead thing has no fear. Fear is part of being alive, part of being delicate, part of being fragile.
So allow the fear. Tremble with it, let it shake your foundations -- and enjoy it as a deep experience of stirring. Don't take any attitude about fear... in fact, don't call it fear. The moment you have called it fear you have taken an attitude. You have already condemned it; you have already said that it is wrong, that it should not be there. You are already on guard, already escaping, running away. In a very subtle way you have broken yourself away from it. So don't call it fear.
This is one of the most essential things -- to stop calling things names. Just watch the feeling of it, the way it is. Allow it, and don't give it a label -- remain ignorant. Ignorance is a tremendously meditative state. Insist on being ignorant, and don't allow the mind to manipulate. Don't allow the mind to use language and words, labels and categories, because it has a whole process. One thing is associated with another, and it goes on and on and on.
Just simply look -- don't call it fear. Become afraid and tremble -- that is beautiful. Hide in a corner, go under a blanket and tremble. Do what an animal will do if he is afraid. What will a small child do if he is afraid? He will cry. Or a primitive man -- what will he do? He will kneel down and pray to a god -- out of fear.
The primitive man's god is more alive than a philosopher's god, because it arises out of a deep biological need, a fear -- the fear of the unknown, of the emptiness surrounding you; the fear of the vastness of it all; the fear that you are a stranger, and the fear that one day you will not be... the fear of non-being. Only primitive people know that when they are possessed by fear, their hairs will stand on end. Civilised people have completely forgotten the language; it has become simply a metaphor. We think it is just a saying, and not really true. But it actually happens.
If you allow fear to take possession of you, your hair will stand on end. Then for the first time you will know what a beautiful phenomenon fear is. In that turmoil, in that cyclone, you will come to know that there is still a point somewhere within you which is absolutely untouched. And if fear cannot touch it, then death cannot touch it. There is darkness and fear all around, with just a small centre absolutely transcendental to it. Not that you try to be transcendental -- you simply allow the fear to totally take possession -- but suddenly you become aware of the contrast.
So if fear or anger or sadness, or anything whatsoever happens, allow it. Close the doors and be in it, relax in it. Just behave like a small child who has not been trained to label things, who simply lives feelings and has no thoughts about them.
Fear is one of the doors from where one enters into one's being.
It is one of the most repressed things. The whole of humanity, all the world over, can be divided into two types: one is sex-repressive, the other is death-repressive. Either a society suppresses death or it suppresses sex. Whenever a society expresses sex, becomes unafraid of it, untabooed, uninhibited about it, it immediately starts to suppress death -- immediately, because death is the polar opposite. So if you allow sex, death has to be repressed. If you repress sex then there is no fear of death, you can allow it.
In the West, since Freud, sex has been untabooed; now death has become the taboo. And whenever death becomes the taboo, fear becomes the suppressed thing. When sex is taboo, love becomes the suppressed thing. Just like sex and death, love and fear are deeply joined.
If you move deeply in meditation, either fear or love will become the door. If death has been suppressed, then fear will be the door. If sex has been suppressed, then love will be the door. For example, in the eastern civilization where sex has been suppressed, is still suppressed, the first thing the mind faces in meditation is love, a deep upsurge of sex energy, because whatsoever is suppressed, uncoils.
You don't have any suppressions about sex, so fear will uncoil. The suppressed and tabooed thing is death, so you have to be deeply relaxed in allowing it. Once fear is allowed, it will soon become death; you will have to pass through a moment of death. Once sex and death are untabooed, man is free.
These are the two tricks to create bondage for humanity. Once neither of these are there, you are freedom; not that you are free -- you are freedom.
It has been good... allow it more....
Mm, if you allow, there is none. Whatsoever is allowed disappears, because everything exists because of repression. If you repress something, it exists, you give it existence. If you allow it, by and by it disappears.
[A sannyasin said that she hadn't felt like meditating regularly as she didn't feel like putting herself in a structure and making herself do anything.]
It is good not to be in any structure, but you can only enjoy that freedom if you put yourself into a structure, otherwise not. You follow me? To be free of a structure is good, but you can only be free if you are in a structure.
So first be in a structure, and then be free of them. First discipline yourself, and then be out of it -- otherwise you will never know what freedom is. To know freedom, one should live in a prison for a few days -- just as part of a growth process. Then you will really know the taste of it, because it is only through the contrast that it can be known.
So if you listen to me, for one month you will put yourself in a structure. Just follow the whole routine and don't listen to the mind that says to do whatsoever you like. After one month I will make you free... then you will know the taste of freedom, otherwise not.
Licence is not freedom; licence is nothing. But freedom is a great achievement which is attained only through discipline. It is not only discipline, but it is achieved through discipline.
First one has to come to one's self -- then freedom is beautiful. Then you can be spontaneous and never allow any structure to settle around you. But first be yourself. Your mind is not you, and the spontaneity of your mind is not your spontaneity -- it is a bondage of the mind. And mind itself is a great prison.
So for one month you do all the meditations, and do the next camp completely. And every morning, whether the talk is hindi or english, you have to be there. If it is a hindi talk, simply listen to my sound -- and sometimes it goes deeper than any understanding. Because you cannot understand the language, you have just to listen to the sound... it becomes a meditation. So every morning you have to be there -- no talk is to be missed. And morning and evening, no meditation is to be missed, mm?
Start tomorrow. Tomorrow will be the twentieth, so next twentieth I will make you free! One month be really a prisoner, right? -- and happily, because it is going to give you much!
Prabodh翻译赞赏译者
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附：关于恐惧的补充 ： 生命中不可能没有恐惧。你会了解到，90%的恐惧都是出自你的想象。而10%的恐惧是真实的，所以你需要去接受它们。变得更有回应，更敏感，更警觉，这就够了。你将会意识到，你可以把恐惧当做垫脚石。
公交车迎面而来司机使劲的按着喇叭，而你一点也不害怕的站在马路中间，或者一头公牛冲向你，而你站在那里一点也不害怕——这简直是愚蠢！一个聪明人会立刻的跳开。或者如果路上没有人，而你感到害怕并开始狂奔，这就有问题了；否则，恐惧是自然的。OSBuddha
