《团团传》第20期 奇怪的人类小孩

最近，有一个人类小孩总在我的旁边玩耍。这是个奇怪的小孩，他长得不像他的爸爸妈妈，因为他既不会走路，也没有牙齿，甚至也不会像他爸爸妈妈一样说话。我有点同情他。

Recently, a human child has been playing next to me. This is a strange child. He doesn’t look like his parents, because he has no teeth. He can neither walk nor speak like his parents. I feel a little empathy for him.

有时候，他把我当作床，在我身上爬来爬去。他把口水滴在我的身上，我也不计较。说实话，我有点喜欢这个小孩。

Sometimes, he treats me like a bed and crawls all over me. He drools on me, but I don’t mind. To be honest, I like him, kind of.

可是，他竟然尿在我的身上了。老天爷啊！我可是一块爱干净的石头。我真想骂他一顿，然而你知道我并没有真的骂他。可是他却哇哇大哭。真奇怪！

But he pees on me. Oh my goodness! I am a clean stone. I want to scold him, but you know, I didn't do that. However, he cries loudly. How strange!

他静静地吮吸自己的手指，吸得“吱吱”响，一边吸一边流口水，我以为他能在手指上吸出奶糖呢。

He quietly sucks his fingers, making a "squeaking" sound, and drools. Can he suck out candy from his fingers?

于是，我就仔细地观察他手指，可是我他的手指上并没有奶，也没有糖。真是个误导石头的小孩！

I carefully observe his fingers, but I find no milk or candy on them. What a child who misleads stones!

有时候，他还会抱起自己的腿，将自己的大脚趾含在嘴里，津津有味地吮吸。这次，我再也不相信他的脚趾上能吸到奶糖了。可是我很纳闷，他为什么要吮吸自己呢？

Sometimes, he even picks up his leg, puts his big toe in his mouth, and sucks it with relish. This time, I no longer believe that there could be candy on his toes. But I wonder why he wants to suck himself?

你知道吗，这个小孩不仅吮吸自己的手指、脚趾，有时候还会吮吸自己的手背、手腕和手臂。我怀疑吮吸这个动作，会让小孩的口腔感觉到香甜。于是，我再一次希望自己也长出嘴，一张真正的嘴，能够吮吸出香甜的嘴。

Do you know that this child not only sucks on his fingers and toes, but sometimes also on the back of his hands, wrists, and arms? I suspect that the suction action might make the child's mouth feel sweet. So, once again, I hope that I could grow a real mouth and suck the sweet taste.

后来，他开始观察我，伸出手抚摸我，用手指抠我，甚至拍打我。可是我既不软，也没有弹性，更不能跑跳着陪他玩。很快，他就对我失去了兴趣。

Later, he begins to observe me, reaches out to touch me, pokes me with his fingers, and even pats me. But I am neither soft nor elastic, let alone running or jumping to play with him. Soon, he loses interest in me.

他开始在到处爬，去探索自然科学世界。比如，他抓到一根树枝就放进嘴里尝一尝，似乎不太好吃，于是开始胡乱挥舞树枝。

He begins to crawl around, exploring the world of natural sciences. For example, he grabs a branch and puts it in his mouth to taste, but it doesn’t seem to taste good, so he starts waving it around wildly.

糟糕，树枝打在小孩自己的腿上了，小孩疼得哇哇大哭。眼泪和鼻涕混合在一起，拉着清亮的丝往下掉，最后滴到了我的身上。我顺着眼泪和鼻涕拉的丝往上看，你猜我看到了什么？我看到了小孩嘴里长出了两颗牙齿！

Oops, the branch hits his leg, causing the child to cry in pain. Tears and snot mix, dripping down onto me. I follow the tears and snot to see what is happening and guess what? I see that two teeth are growing in the child's mouth!

很快，一个野坚果吸引了小孩的注意力。他奋力地爬过去，捡起野坚果就放进嘴里咬，咬不动，他又抓着野坚果胡乱敲打，打在我的身上，我和野坚果都不疼，但是他却疼哭了。

Soon, a wild nut attracts the child's attention. He crawls over, picks up the nut and bits it, but he can’t open it. He then grabs the nut and hits it around aimlessly. Neither I nor the nuts hurt, but he cries in pain.

你看，他又在品尝一块石头了。或许这个石头不太好吃，他流着口水吐了出来，脸皱成了一团，马上又要哭了。

Look, he's tasting another piece of stone. Perhaps it doesn’t taste good, and he spits it out with saliva. His face wrinkles, and he is about to cry again.