学术会议大牌参会指南（中英双语版）

此宝典对那些还没成大牌但一心想成大牌的学者应该有针对性极强的指导意义，而对那些已是大牌或自认为已是大牌的学者来说也值得随身携带或日颂三遍，因为据观察，即使是大牌，在学术会议上也常常有被大伙有眼不识泰山从而不把大牌当大牌看的时候。

1

   私人定制日程

会议组织者制定的会议开始和结束时间往往不切实际，所以你不要觉得你应该遵守，你完全可以定制你个人的到达和离开时间，并要求工作人员提供个性化服务。例如，对你来说，很可能最方便的到达时间正好是在注册期后，这样就免得你排队等待你的胸牌；你也可能得早点离开，因为最后一节会议的出席率实在是太低了，所以不值得为它留下来。

英文：Book your travel wisely

Don’t feel obliged to put yourself out to meet the start and finish times set by the organisers, which are rarely realistic. It’s likely that the most convenient travel arrangements will entail your arriving well after the registration period, which obviates the need for you to queue for your badge and ensures personalised service from front-desk staff. It’s also likely that you’ll have to leave early, but the final session of a conference is so poorly attended that it’s not worth staying for.

2

补充水分

大牌往往跑得多、讲得多，因此需要喝得多，不断补充水分。学术会议往往会提供饮料，特别是有大牌出席的会议，饮料尤其琳琅满目，你要充分享用它们。饮料喝多了可能需要频繁上厕所，你不必对此有任何顾忌，你完全可以随心所欲地在会场和厕所之间切换，甚至把会场当厕所，想进就进，想出就出。咖啡休息时间永远不够长，所以你也别着急，要慢慢享用、尽情享受，即使这意味着下一节会议要迟到几分钟。

英文：Keep hydrated
There will be an abundance of liquid refreshment available – make the most of it. This may require more frequent visits to the lavatory, but you can excuse yourself from sessions whenever necessary. Coffee breaks are never long enough, so take your time, even if it means being a few minutes late for the next session – schedules are only ever indicative.

3

座位就是地位

尽管你可能需要不止一次离开会场（见第2点），但不要觉得这样你应该占据一个靠门的差座位——你也是付了会议费的（或你的机构帮你付了），所以你应该得到一个靠前的好座位。当你从同事面前经过，踩到他们的脚，碰倒他们的咖啡时，不必理会他们的抗议——地球人都知道，学者们太敏感。当你返回会场时，不一定非要坐到原来的座位上，你可以想坐哪就坐哪，在任何情况下都不要对此感觉有压力。在问答环节你甚至应该被妥善安排到更好的座位上。

英文：Pick a good seat
Although you are likely to need to leave presentations more than once (see point 2), don’t feel obliged to occupy an inferior seat near the door – you’ve paid your fee (or your institution has), so you deserve a prime position. Ignore the protests of your colleagues as you slide past them, stepping on their feet and spilling their coffee – academics are notoriously sensitive. When you return, under no circumstances feel pressured into taking a different seat. You must be well placed for the Q&A session.

4

 提问是门很深的学问

尽管报告人不可能告诉你任何你不知道的东西，但对你来说，问答环节是你用你对一个主题独特而富有洞察的见解给其他代表留下深刻印象的绝佳机会。记住，提问永远要从感谢报告人作了个很好的报告开始（赞美的话人人爱听），然后找到报告人的工作与你的工作之间的一个关联，不管这种关联多么牵强附会。高明的学者都是这么做的：先对自己最近的研究项目或论文发表一个冗长的演说，然后问报告人：“…我想知道你对此有什么看法？”

英文：Make the most of your questions
Although it’s unlikely that any speaker is going to tell you anything you didn’t already know, the Q&A is a great opportunity for you to impress other delegates with your unique and discerning take on a subject. Always begin by thanking the speaker for a fascinating talk (courtesy costs nothing), then find a link to your own work, however tenuous. Skilled practitioners offer a lengthy peroration on their most recent research project or publication and then ask: “…and I wondered if you had any thoughts about that?”

5

 重要的事情不开会，开会的事情不重要

大多数会议只包含少数相关或有趣的分会场，所以充分利用你的“闲暇时间”做一些更重要的事情或见一些更重要的人——这可能比开会本身更重要，也是许多立志成大牌的学者不远万里参加大牌云集的会议的最主要驱动力。通常有大量公共空间让你做这些，这就有利于你在开幕式或并行会场上出现在大伙的视线或听力范围内（简单说叫亮相）。

记住，你越是敢于在重要的会议（例如开幕式）上在众目睽睽之下迟到或早退，你越能给人感觉你好像为这个会议错过了一些很重要的事情。

英文：Be selective
Most conferences will contain only a few relevant or interesting sessions, so make the most of your “down time” to get on with something more important. There are usually plenty of public spaces for you to do this, which have the advantage of being within sight or earshot of keynote or parallel sessions, so you can always slip in late if it looks like you’re missing out on something worthwhile.

6

  跑场子

会议组织者似乎总是故意把少数几个让你感兴趣的报告安排在几个不同的分会场，所以你得准备在几个会场之间穿梭或跑场子。再次提醒，不要觉得你应该坐在一个靠门的座位以减少你的进出对他人的影响，你也不必歉疚地或悄悄地进入下一个会场。勇敢地坐到你的新座位上，即使你要从一个定位不佳的投影仪前穿过。如果你幸运的话，你会赶上前一个报告人的结尾，这将使你可以提一个问题（见第4点）。

英文：Panel-surf
Conference organisers seem perversely skilled at scheduling the few things that interest you across different parallel sessions, so be prepared to flit between them. Again, do not feel you need to take a seat by the door to minimise the impact of your exit, and neither should you enter the next session apologetically or quietly. Be assertive in taking your new seat, even if this means walking in front of a poorly positioned projector; if you’re lucky, you’ll catch the conclusion of the previous speaker’s presentation, which will enable you to ask a question (see point 4).

7

  日理万机

如果你不幸发现自己坐在一个不相关的会场，但出于某种原因觉得有必要留下来（例如其中一个报告人是大牛或你想套瓷），那么你可以边开会边检查你的电子邮件、与远方的朋友QQ或微信——大伙会认为你嘈杂的打字声是在“记笔记”。

英文：Multitask
If you’re unlucky enough to find yourself in an irrelevant session, but for some reason feel obliged to stay (one of the speakers might be attractive, for example), use the time to check your emails – people will assume that your noisy typing is “note-taking”.

8

  分享你的专业知识

并不是所有学者都像你一样善于作报告。在报告过程中，如果你察觉到一些不恰当的表述或术语不准确，可以立马打断报告人，向其提出质疑或替其澄清。你甚至可以在报告结束前抢先提一些问题。

英文：Share the benefits of your expertise
Not all academics are as adept at presenting as you are. If, during a presentation, you perceive some infelicity of expression or lack of precision in terminology, do interject with a query or clarification; although they may not say so, your colleagues will be grateful. You may even pre-empt some of the questions at the end (for which there will now be less time).

9

  娓娓道来

当你自己作报告时，一定要确保你的报告时间多于规定时间（一般是15或20分钟），因为在如此短的时间内，你不可能讲清楚你工作的细节和复杂性，特别是，对于那些有重要工作要报告的人来说，理应有额外时间。

如果你不幸刚好碰到一个特别警觉和较真的主持人，他（她）坚持认为你的时间已到了，那么你只要对他（她）淡然一笑并保证一分钟内结束，便可继续讲你的报告。这样你可以轻而易举地延长3分钟，然后5分钟，等等。或者，你索性陶醉于自己的演说中，不要与会场里的任何人有眼神接触（见10）。

英文：Take your time
When presenting your own paper, make sure to take more than the 15 or 20 minutes on offer. It is impossible for you to communicate the detail and complexity of your work in such an impoverished period, and extra time is always available for those with something significant to offer. If you are unlucky enough to have a particularly vigilant chairperson who insists that your time is up, simply smile charmingly and promise to finish in a minute. This can very easily be extended to three, then five, and so on. Alternatively, avoid eye contact with anyone in the room (see point 10).

10

 要念不要讲

你在作报告时，切记你在呈现一篇学术论文的工作，而不是在婚礼上演讲。你的听众都是学究，他们期望深度和严谨，所以你要念、一字不差地念你的论文。既然你在你的论文写作上花了相当多的时间和心血，那么它应该就是最好的呈现形式，所以不要偏离它。实践表明，念，尽管可能不生动，但可以永保无比正确；讲，尽管可能引人入胜，但思绪一飘就可能跑题甚至犯错。

英文：Read, don’t ‘speak’
When presenting, remember that you are giving an academic paper, not a speech at a wedding. Your audience expects depth and rigour, so read, verbatim, from your written paper. Since you spent considerable time crafting it, don’t deviate from it, even at the risk of occasionally appearing unfamiliar with your own writing – or, indeed, any form of animated human communication.

11

牢记你为什么来这儿

你的机构在你身上投重资（支付你的交通、住宿和会议费），是因为你值得投资。记住，你只要到会，你的工作就算完成了，你应该尽情享受旅行的所有乐趣。利用开会机会，领略世界各地的风土人情和文化，不仅是你的权利，更是一种义务。没有人严格要求你把所有时间浪费在会场，而且，毕竟你的伴侣也一起来了，她（他）可不是来开会的。

英文：Remember why you’re there
Your institution has invested heavily in you (paying your travel, accommodation and conference fee) because you’re worth it. When you have presented, your work is done and you deserve to indulge in all of the pleasures of travel. Cultural enrichment is not merely your right, it’s an obligation – no one could seriously expect you to waste all your time in a conference venue, and, after all, your partner has come along for a mini-break.