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In a quiet village nestled deep in the Taihang Mountains of Shanxi Province, the life and tragic death of a young woman named Ren Meifang have captured nationwide attention. Her story is one of love, hardship, and deep-rooted cultural traditions. From a conventional marriage in life to an eerie “ghost marriage” in death, her two weddings shed light on the struggles and expectations faced by rural women in China.
Born in 1999 in a small village in Zuoquan County, Shanxi, Ren Meifang’s early life was marked by poverty. Her father was physically disabled, and her mother suffered from mental illness. To cope with the family’s financial difficulties, one of her two elder brothers was given away to a neighboring family.
Despite these challenges, Ren was ambitious and determined to build a better life. She attended vocational school, worked in factories, and tried her luck in nearby cities. In 2022, at the age of 23, she married a man from a nearby town. A year later, she gave birth to a daughter. However, the marriage quickly soured, leading to a divorce and a custody battle over her child.
Ren was deeply torn between her desire for independence and her responsibilities toward her family. On social media, she wrote, “I want to get married and have my own family, away from my original family. But I don’t want to get married because I still have family to take care of.”
On August 9, 2024, Ren visited her ex-husband’s home in an attempt to see her daughter. Denied access to her child, she drank pesticide outside his house in despair. She died the following day at just 25 years old.
In her rural community, local customs dictated that divorced women could not be buried in their natal family’s ancestral graveyard. To ensure that she would have a proper resting place, her family arranged for her to enter into a "ghost marriage" with a deceased man.
The practice of ghost marriage, where deceased individuals are symbolically married, remains a rare but persistent tradition in some rural parts of China. It is believed to provide comfort to the deceased and ensure that they are not alone in the afterlife.
Two days after Ren’s death, her family arranged a ghost marriage with a man who had died in a mining accident two years earlier. The ceremony, held on a roadside near her village, bore striking similarities to a traditional wedding. Her photograph, smiling and radiant, served as the wedding portrait. Her coffin was placed beside that of her deceased "husband," and the two were buried together.
The groom’s family covered the expenses for the ceremony, which included a traditional band, a banquet, and an “inheritance” payment of 88,000 yuan to Ren’s family. For the groom’s family, the marriage was not only a way to honor their deceased son but also a way to prevent his grave from being disturbed by grave robbers, a known issue in the region.
Ren’s story went viral after her death, with her social media account flooded with comments expressing sorrow and frustration. Many lamented the hardships she faced and criticized the societal pressures that contributed to her tragic end.
One comment, liked over 7,000 times, read, “I hope you find happiness in the next world, free from the misfortune of this one.”
Ren Meifang’s life was full of contradictions. She was a bright and independent young woman who loved to document her daily life on social media, sharing moments of joy, dancing, and spending time with her family. Yet, behind the smiles in her videos was a life filled with struggles.
She juggled her desire for freedom and individuality with the heavy burdens placed upon her by her family and society. In her own words, she longed for “a ray of sunlight” amidst the darkness of her circumstances.
For Ren’s family, the ghost marriage was a way to provide her with a resting place close to her daughter and, perhaps, a sense of peace in the afterlife. Her brother, Ren Zhiwei, explained, “We hope this will give her some comfort. At least she will be near her child, and when her daughter grows up, she will know she had a mother who loved her.”
Source: Southern Weekly
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