在人生的长河中，我们总会遇到各式各样的人，经历各种各样的情。有时，我们会在某段关系中沉沦，不是因为对方的决绝让人难以释怀，而是因为我们心中那份不切实际的期待，如同无形的枷锁，紧紧束缚着我们的心灵。In the long river of life, we will always encounter various people and experience all kinds of emotions. Sometimes, we become immersed in a certain relationship, not because the other person's resoluteness is hard to let go, but because the unrealistic expectations in our hearts act like invisible shackles, tightly binding our souls.古人云：“相思本是无凭语，莫向花笺费泪行。”（晏几道《鹧鸪天·醉拍春衫惜旧香》）这句话道出了相思之苦，实则也揭示了期待之殇。我们总以为，只要付出真心，便能换得对方的回应；只要坚持等待，便能迎来美好的结局。然而，现实往往残酷，不是所有的付出都能得到回报，不是所有的等待都能迎来花开。当希望落空，我们便会陷入无尽的痛苦之中，殊不知，这痛苦并非源自对方的绝情，而是源自我们内心那份无法割舍的期待。The ancients said, "Love's thoughts are words without proof; do not waste tears on the floral letter paper." (Yan Jidao, "Song of the Partridge Sky - Drunkenly Patting My Spring Clothes, Cherishing the Old Fragrance") This sentence reveals the bitterness of lovesickness, but it also exposes the pain of expectation. We always think that as long as we give our hearts, we can receive a response from the other person; as long as we persist in waiting, we can usher in a beautiful ending. However, reality is often cruel. Not all efforts can be rewarded, and not all waiting can lead to blooming flowers. When hopes are dashed, we fall into endless pain, not realizing that this pain does not stem from the other person's resoluteness, but from the expectations in our hearts that we cannot let go.在夫妻相处之道中，这样的例子屡见不鲜。古有陆游与唐婉，情深意重却终因世俗偏见而分离，陆游在《钗头凤》中写道：“一怀愁绪，几年离索。错，错，错！”这里的“错”字，既是对命运无常的感慨，也是对自己无法放下期待的无奈。他们之间的悲剧，何尝不是因为对彼此太过期待，而现实却无法满足这份期待所造成的呢？In the way of marital relationships, such examples are common. In ancient times, there were Lu You and Tang Wan, deeply attached but ultimately separated due to worldly prejudices. Lu You wrote in "Chai Tou Feng": "A heart full of sorrow, several years of separation. Wrong, wrong, wrong!" The word "wrong" here is not only a lament for the unpredictability of fate but also a helplessness for being unable to let go of his own expectations. Wasn't the tragedy between them caused by having too many expectations of each other, which reality could not fulfill?现实生活中，这样的故事同样在上演。许多夫妻在相处过程中，总希望对方能按照自己的意愿去改变，去迎合自己的期待。然而，每个人都是独立的个体，有着自己的思想和意愿。当期待无法实现时，便会产生失望和怨恨，从而折磨着自己的内心。其实，折磨我们的并不是对方的绝情或不解风情，而是我们自己一直心存幻想的期待。In real life, such stories are also being played out. Many couples, in their interactions, always hope that the other person will change according to their wishes and meet their expectations. However, everyone is an independent individual with their own thoughts and wills. When expectations cannot be realized, disappointment and resentment arise, torturing our inner selves. In fact, it is not the other person's resoluteness or lack of understanding that torments us, but the fantastic expectations we always harbor in our hearts.学会放下不切实际的期待，是解脱自己、也是放过他人的开始。正如佛家所言：“放下屠刀，立地成佛。”这里的“屠刀”并非实指，而是指我们内心的执念和期待。只有当我们学会放下这些执念和期待时，才能真正做到心态平和、从容面对生活中的种种变故。
Learning to let go of unrealistic expectations is the beginning of liberating ourselves and also releasing others. Just as Buddhism says, "Put down the butcher's knife, and instantly become a Buddha." The "butcher's knife" here is not literal but refers to our inner obsessions and expectations. Only when we learn to let go of these obsessions and expectations can we truly achieve a peaceful mindset and calmly face the various changes in life.
