Rule 4:COMPARE YOURSELF TO WHO YOU WERE YESTERDAY, NOT TO WHO SOMEONE ELSE IS TODAY
和昨天的自己比，别和今天的别人比
你需要认清自己是谁
想要什么，愿意做什么
然后你会发现
解决自己特有问题的方案是需要量身定制的
Do you want to improve your life and your future? Do not look atothers. Look at yourself.
The author contends that inside of us all there is an ‘internal critic.’ This critic compares us to others and often tells us thereis always someone out there better than us.
However, the internal critic does not consider that “We are not equal in ability or outcome, and never will be.” We all have different strengths and weaknesses. Therefore, why compare ourselves to someone else?
你想改善自己的生活和未来吗？不要看别人。看看你自己。
作者认为，我们所有人内部都有一个“内部批评家”。这位批评家将我们与其他人进行比较，并经常告诉我们总有人比我们更好。
内部批评者并不认为“人的能力或结果永远是不平等的”。每个人各有长短。因此，为什么要把自己与别人比较？
Unfortunately, there are winners and losers and many of us feel condemned to be on the bottom rung of the ladder in life or in tasks. Nonetheless, if your internal critic makes you doubt your life, donot listen. To this, some say, “There will always be people better than you”. No. That is nihilism. Maybe your inner critic is unreliable.
不幸的是，总是会有胜利者也有失败者，我们许多人都被谴责成是生活或任务中阶梯的最底层。所以，如果我们内心的内部批评家使你产生自我怀疑，请不要听。有人说：“总会有人比你更好”。这也是不对的，这是虚无主义。你内心的批评家也许是不可靠的。
Of course, we should remember that there is such a concept as better or worse. There must be. To do anything, there must be value to it. And we tend to see things as success or failure, nothing else.However, we all try to accomplish different tasks and many of them. If you cannot be the best in one, try another. In addition, we often overvalue what we do not have and undervalue what we have. We do this especially when we are young as we are not informed or individual enough to know better.
当然，我们应该知道，‘更好‘或‘更坏‘的概念是存在的。做任何事情，都必须有价值。而我们却倾向于将事情定义为成功或失败，仅此而已。但是，我们所有人都在尝试完成许多不同的任务。如果你不能在某一件事情上做到最好，请尝试另一件。此外，我们经常高估我们所没有的而低估我们所拥有的。尤其是在我们年轻的时候，因为我们没有足够的知识或认知。
成功和失败是两个非黑即白的用词，它们排除了所有折中的可能性，这是一个不成熟甚至带有恶意的评论，这样的二元体系抹杀了许多重要的价值分级和层次，也必然会带来恶果。
Therefore, treat yourself as a stranger, ask yourself probing questions, find out about yourself. For example, what do you find valuable, pleasurable? How much leisure or reward do you require?
Be truthful with yourself because that is where the answer to improving your life lies.
所以，把自己当作一个陌生人，问自己一些问题，了解自己。例如，你觉得有价值的，令人愉悦的是什么？为了鼓励自己做一些让自己更好的事情你需要多少休闲或奖励？
对自己诚实，因为这是改善生活的答案所在。
What are you pretending to like or putting up with? Are you resentful? Resentment can be a sign of immaturity or that there is tyranny around you. Think about what to let go in your life or what to pursue.
Furthermore, it is true of the human condition that we regard the present as eternally lacking, but the future as eternally better. We compare what is and what could be. We aim, sometimes too high, other times too low.
你在假装喜欢或忍受什么吗？你充满怨恨不满吗？怨恨不满可能是不成熟的标记（那么你应该停止抱怨，继续努力），或者是你的周围让你感到压抑（那么你有义务大胆发声说出来）。考虑一下生活中该放弃的东西或应该追求什么。
此外，人类的状况中，我们总是把当下定义为永远匮乏的，而未来却是永远美好的。我们喜欢把当下和未来做比较，比较‘是什么（当下）‘以及‘可能是什么（未来或者假设）’。我们的目标有时太高，有时又太低。
First of all, you must take stock. You need to benefit from your inherent imagination, creativity and ability to improve your future.Ask yourself, “Who am I? “The good and the bad. You need to know this in order to fix it. Your internal critic can help. It may suggest something to fix. When we try to fix something in our lives,we travel from A to B. It is a journey. This may not be easy. You mayhave to persuade or push yourself. At times, you may fail, but keepgoing. Reward yourself, if necessary. Often the journey is more important than the destination. A lot of happiness comes from the hope for what will be.
Remember: be better for your own standards and opinion, not those ofother people, and start by aiming small.
首先，你必须厘清自己。从内在的想象力，创造力和改善未来的能力中受益。问问自己，“我是谁？”自己的好处与坏处。你需要知道这一点才能修复它。你的内部评论家可以提供帮助。它可能会建议要解决的问题。当我们尝试解决生活中的某些问题时，我们会从相对不理想的A点去到更符合自己价值判断的B点。这是一段旅程，可能并不容易，你可能需要说服或推动自己。有时甚至可能会失败，但请继续前进。如有必要，奖励自己。过程比目的地重要。许多幸福来自对未来的希望。
切记：以自己的标准和意见（而不是其他人的标准）为准，并从小目标着手。
The author goes on to cite a famous experiment, namely, The Gorilla Experiment, conducted by a Dr. Simons. First, Dr. Simons made a video of two teams with three people in each. One team wore white, the other black. Each team had a ball which they bounced to their fellow team members. He showed this video to participants in his experimentand told them to count the number of times the white team memberspassed the ball to one another. At the end, he asked, “How manytimes did they pass the ball?” He received the reply, “Fifteen.”That was the correct answer. Everyone was happy. Then he asked, “Didyou see the gorilla?” The participants replied, “What gorilla?”
They watched the same video again but were told not to count. And,yes, they saw a man in a gorilla suit walk into the middle of the game while the ball was being bounced. He even beat his chest.
作者接着引用了著名的实验，即西蒙斯博士进行的“大猩猩实验”。首先，西蒙斯（Simons）博士制作了两个组的视频，每组各三个人。一队穿着白色衣服，另一队穿黑色。每个团队各有一个球，然后弹给队友。他向参加实验的参与者展示了这段视频，并告诉他们计算白衣队员将球传给对方的次数。最后，他问：“他们传了几次球？”他收到了“十五”的答复，那是正确的答案，大家都很开心，然后他问：“你们看到大猩猩了吗？”参与者回答：“什么大猩猩？”
他们再次观看了同一视频，但被告知不要计数。这次，他们看到一个穿着大猩猩服的男人在球被弹跳时走进比赛的中间。他甚至像猩猩一样拍打了自己的胸部。
你追求什么，决定了你看见什么
看见是很难的，所以你必须选择看见什么，忽略什么
We often look at what we are aiming at and put everything else in the background. You see obstacles in your path and can be blind to all else. In a way, your eyes are tools to find you what you want.
Sometimes, however, you are unhappy because you are not getting what you need. This may be because of what you want. What you need is right in front of you, but you are blinded by what you want. Example:maybe you are unhappy because you do not have your boss’s job. He is good at it and will not leave. However, maybe you are unhappy not because you do not have his job but because you want it. Clearly, wanting the job is not working for you.
Therefore, make a different plan. Try to want something else that will make you happy. Make a sacrifice and you will see new hope. This will only work if you truly wish to improve, of course. If you aim for something different – in order to improve life – your mind will present you new information. Note: everything you value is a product of mental processes, personal, cultural and biological. You do not know everything you want!
我们经常一叶障目的只盯着我们的目标，而忽略了其他一切。你会在前进的道路上看到障碍，对其他所有事物都视而不见。在某种程度上，你的眼睛是找到所需内容的工具。
有时候你会因为自己的愿望无法满足而感到不满。这可能是由于你想要的，你所需要的就在你面前，但是你对所需要的东西视而不见。例如：你不开心，因为你希望代替你老板的职位，但是他工作出色并且不会离开。但是，也许你不高兴不是因为你无法得到他的工作。很显然，惦记这个职位对你是不现实和令你不快乐的。
因此，制定其他计划。尝试其他可以让你开心的其他事情。放手做出必要的牺牲，你将看到新的希望。当然，这只有在你确实希望改进的情况下才有效。如果你为了提升生活去追求不同的目标，你的大脑将为你提供新的信息。注意：你的所有价值观都是个人，文化和生物漫长发展过程的产物。
生活的不顺或许不是因为生活本身，而是源自你的无知
Pay attention.
“Focus on your surroundings, physical and psychological.” Findsomething that bothers you. Ask yourself, “Am I willing to fix it?”If not, look for something else. Perhaps in the morning, look aroundand think about such possible tasks. Ask, “What am I willing to do to make my life better?” Asking yourself questions, discovering answers about yourself is key to improvement. Keep doing this till itis a habit. Do not be to talitarian. Be kind but be honest. It is about you not someone else.
Compare yourself to who you were yesterday, not to who someone elseis today.
集中注意力。
“关注你的周围，身体和心理。”找到困扰你但是又有能力和意愿去改变的东西。问问自己，“我愿意修复它吗？”如果没有，请继续寻找。也许可以在早上试着冥想考虑一个可能实现的任务。问：“我愿意做什么来改善自己的生活？”问自己一些问题，找到自己问题的答案是改进的关键。继续保持直到它成为一种习惯。不要极端，友善但诚实。因为这是关于你而不是别人的。
和昨天的自己比，别和今天的别人比
